Humor

Nutmegs are among the most brutal ways for a footballer to humiliate an opponent. Something about the act of a football going in between a footballer's legs and geting collected on the other side can leave one drained of one's will to live. The following videos are of nutmegs so ruthless we highly doubt any of the players on the receiving end have ever been seen again.

This is like one of those Oscars "In Memoriam" montages but for footballers.

(Sad piano music plays)

We all know this: Cristiano Ronaldo is one of the best football players in history.

He has given unquestionable proof of it with a monster bycicle kick against Juventus in the UCL quarterfinals.

However, Ronaldo has a personality that not everyone loves. In fact, many soccer fans kind of hate him in spite of his unquestionable quality.

We may have done it — we may have found the biggest fair-weather football fan on the planet. All it took was one incredible kick of the ball. 

Football fans typically pride themselves in devoting themselves to a team. Normally fans will support two teams: their local club and their national team. Americans might add a European team as well, but typically the most dedicated fans focus on one or two teams. 

Then there’s this guy, Moe. 

Mario Melchiot knows more about football than you or I. He knows more about football than the both of us combined. A native of Amsterdam, Melchiot was a product of the legendary Ajax youth system, making his debut for the first team as a 20-year-old before transferring to Chelsea at just 22.

He played extensively in the Premier League for the Blues, Birmingham City and Wigan Athletic, as well as amassing 22 international caps for the Netherlands over an eight-year international spell.

The Miami MLS team is expected to compete in American soccer's highest division someday, eventually, probably. Because of the proposed team's enviable location and its connection to David Beckham, some big names are already being associated with the team, which doesn't even have a name yet.

But.

The true beauty of soccer is its ability to bring so many different cultures together. It allows people to interact and find common ground who would never do so normally. Sometimes when cultures collide in this manner there can be little mistakes. Sometimes these mistakes take the form of very silly names. Like these:

Josh Windass

Kevin Lasagna

Marco Boogers

Bongo Christ

Danny Invincible

Creedence Clearwater Couto

Fabian Assman

Ricky van Wolfswinkel

Thomas Partey

Jean-Kevin Augustin

Maxwell Cornet

The World Cup is drawing closer and closer (79 days!). With that in mind, we have devoted ourselves to a sociological effort: defining the different kinds of World Cup fans out there. 

The World Cup Favorites 

These fans are outright obnoxious.

Not many countries can honestly say they are serious candidates to win the World Cup. Fans from countries with an actual chance of winning the trophy exude confidence and often, arrogance. The only consolation the rest of us have is watching one of these nations fail.

Barcelona are constantly linked with big-name attackers and we are frankly sick of it. Whether Antoine Griezmann, to pull a name out of thin air, is going to join Barcelona will not be decided until the summer so why are we even talking about it right now? Because the bloodthirsty masses love their transfer rumors, and we must placate them with tasty transfer morsels lest they turn on us and devour us all.

So, we don't know who is going to join Barcelona this summer, but we do know who definitely isn't:

Gyasi Zardes

Kazuyoshi “King Kazu” Miura

Sergio Ramos