Manchester United

You're abroad: a different language, a new culture and altogether different customs. You've been gathering up courage, repeating the appropriate local phrase over and over again in your head. 

This is what traveling is all about. You make eye contact with the waiter and let that silver tongue loose. You're a cosmopolitan now. 

Suddenly, the momentary pride you feel is replaced with a sinking sense of horror as the curveball arrives. Your prepared statement is returned back to you in the form of some unintelligible question. 

It seems that hat tricks are already a piece of cake in modern soccer. Now the fashion is to score five goals within a few minutes of a match, as Sergio Aguero did for Manchester City this weekend.

On September 22, Robert Lewandowski did it in nine minutes in the Bundesliga, and now Aguero has emulated Bayern Munich’s forward in a 6-1 win over Newcastle in the Premier League.

Sergio Aguero is a frustrating striker for Manchester City fans. He’s ridiculously good when he’s on form, but he just isn’t on form all that often. Injuries have often been to blame, but that doesn’t make him any less inconsistent.

Chalk this story up to the gossip column here at the18.com. But fresh off scoring his first goal for Manchester United in the Premier League, Memphis Depay has been spotted canoodling and shopping around Manchester with singer Chris Brown’s ex-girlfriend, Karrueche Tran.

According to onlookers, the pair attended the same night spots in Manchester on Saturday night, as they were both seen outside Suburbia nightclub and Club LIV. Then, following a night of Saturday partying the pair indulged in a day of shopping and strolling Monday afternoon.

It's no surprise that Sir Alex Ferguson has a special place in his heart for Ronaldo. After all, the legendary Manchester United skipper brought Cristiano Ronaldo up through the ranks at United and, some would argue, cultivated him in his youth to become the world class player he is today. Ferguson has even gone so far as to say that Ronaldo is, in a nutshell, a better player and asset to a team than Messi.

David Attenborough is perhaps best-known for his narration of the television series "Planet Earth" and for his nature show on the BBC. 

What he is not known for is soccer commentary, but that's just what happened when someone (who we must say is a proper genius) put audio of David Attenborough's narration over a clip of Manchester United practicing.

The bit about Wayne Rooney in particular made our day better.

The Champions League group stages are a joy for any football, futbol, and soccer fan alike because it means double the games during the week to watch your favorite club compete in Europe. Plus, it’s not everyday that Juventus, Manchester United, or Paris St. Germain come through town for a match. 

Yet, the sky blue in the north of England must have missed the memo about City’s match against Juventus in the first group stage match of the year. The expanding Etihad Stadium that is soon to house over 60,000 spectators was having trouble selling out the stadium. 

Manchester United's Luke Shaw has suffered a horrific leg break during Tuesday's Champions League match between Manchester United and PSV Eindhoven. PSV's Hector Moreno made the tackle.

The injury comes after a bright start to the season from Shaw, who impressed in a full-back role for the Red Devils.

Now in his second season at Manchester United Louis Van Gaal has wasted no time in doing what he has become legendary for: pissing everybody off.

Ex and current players alike are coming out of the woodwork. Even players who have never had Van Gaal as a manager hate Louis Van Gaal.

Zlatan doesn’t see eye to eye with Van Gaal, but then again the only person Zlatan really sees eye to eye with is Zlatan.