Funny

First off, I just have to say I love how this guy absolutely hammers the ball without bothering to do anything whatsoever with his body shape. If I opened a footballing school for the gifted, this is the technique I would impart to my pupils. If ever, ever the ball the ball sits nicely in front of you, preferably on the bounce, just lace it. It’ll be worth it, no matter what happens. 

But what happens next, after he catches that sumbitch flush, is a miracle. 

The biggest story of Benfica's 1-0 home win against Borussia Dortmund in the Champions League round of 16 was undoubtedly a scout from Wigan Athletic, currently 22nd in the Championship, showing up to take in the contest.

So far the highlight of tonight is learning that Wigan Athletic have a scout at a Champions League QF. What a club.

— Greg Farrimond (@GregFarrimond) February 14, 2017

No matter the field they play on, geniuses are a difficult breed to understand. Each of them has his or her own peculiarities and habits that we will never understand because they see things on a different level. Albert Einstein once picked up a grasshopper from the ground and ate it. He also used to go on bird-watching walks while playing the violin and crying. Nikola Tesla had an aversion to jewelry; Vincent van Gogh severed part of his own ear. The list goes on.

But what does any of this have to do with soccer?

Picture this: Cristiano Ronaldo is walking around in his house and his mom pokes her head through a doorway and says, "Cris, dinner's ready!"

She says this in Portuguese, of course.

Would this be weird? Can you picture it? I can only sort of picture it, and I've had to work my way up to that point. It's easier to believe if it's his mom, because your mom can call you whatever fool name she wants without any consequences, but what about other people in his life? His chef? His coaches and teammates? His romantic partners?

Luis Boa Morte showed up on MTV Cribs sometime in the early 2000s, and it’s unclear if he’d ever really been inside his own place before. The Portuguese international had only just signed with Fulham after failing to breakthrough at Arsenal and Southampton, so it appears as though his life was in heavy transition when the MTV camera crew showed up to take a look around his unassuming flat in Surrey.

“This is my house,” says Boa Morte as he enters the front door. “This is my living room. I don’t spend much time here.”