Humor

Arsene Wenger has a process, a recipe if you will, for how he wants things done. In an effort to reach his young charges, the venerable, white-haired Professor has created a training simulation using virtual reality to turn raw ingredients into mouthwatering fare. 

Here’s a taste of what he’s cooked up: 

It’s a bit frightening, but that’s the point. Arsenal players must toughen up, with a crispy outer layer of seasoning and experience. 

Simon Mignolet is a solid guy. The 29-year-old Belgian shot-stopper isn’t renowned for his incredible reflexes, an impeccable command of his area or world-class distribution, but he’s pretty dependable. “He is solid, he is like a machine. You can always rely on him,” says Liverpool boss Jurgen Klopp.

Arsenal's 4-0 defeat at the hands of Liverpool Sunday has had Arsenal fans' heads spinning around like they've been possessed by demons. And those demons want Arsene Wenger to be fired.

Cristiano Ronaldo has been WRONGED. By the SYSTEM. Cruelly banished from four La Liga matches for the minor offense of pushing a referee, Ronaldo will not allow himself to be broken so easily.

Ronaldo tweeted his displeasure at his UNFAIR sentence.

Mais uma decisão incompreensível. Injustiças que nunca me derrubarão. E como sempre voltarei mais forte. Obrigado aos que me têm apoiado. pic.twitter.com/O7Et9A8Edp

Counterattack mitigation is probably the most important skill in any defensive midfielder's arsenal. Often tasked with protecting a vulnerable back line, elite defensive midfielders must get their spacing and decision-making correct every time.

FK Sloboda is a football club and not in the construction business. This was apparent Sunday when building a wall to defend a free kick against HŠK Zrinjski in the Premier League of Bosnia & Herzegovina.

Thanks to state-of-the-art microphone technology, we were able to pick up on the conversation that went on as Sloboda planned out its strategy.

“Everybody listen up. I have the best plan, the greatest plan, a better plan than any of the tacticians in Italy or England could think up.”

“OK skipper, what have you got in mind for defending this free kick?”

Notts County scores. Darkness falls and magic stirs as Matt Tootle becomes a creature of the night — a nightcrawler! But it looks like it’s time for an intervention with the rest of his teammates, because they just don’t look interested in joining Tootle for a quick game.

Nightcrawlers is just what it sounds like, it’s a game where you crawl around like worms in the night, mining minerals under the bed while using your imagination. Tootle clearly knows what’s up.