WTF

These Quarantine Hairstyles Are Guaranteed To Make You Better, Faster, Stronger

Salons and barbershops are closed across the country. We’ve reached a month-long impasse: Do we opt for the quarantine cut, or do we grow it out?

I hope that you’re doing the righteous thing and adding more volume to that vinaigrette. Don't go this route:

Soccer Things That Definitely Caused The Coronavirus Pandemic, Probably

Damn how we miss the soccers. Life without football filling our days and nights is not the life we expected and certainly not one we ever wanted.

It’s human nature to try to blame someone or something else for this unfortunate period of our lives. But who deserves blame for a global pandemic? 

Sure, various governments could have done more to protect their people, particularly the ones that abolished the very groups created to fight such pandemics and/or ignored the warnings of experts. 

Coronavirus-Fighting Superhero Powered By Hatred Of Liverpool Upsets Sensitive Fanboys

Singapore's government has axed an entire team of coronavirus-fighting mascots after one Liverpool-hating member of the five-strong band of fictional superheroes ended up enraging a section of the city's passionate soccer supporters.

The mascot, named MAWA (Must Always Walk Alone) Man, a play on Liverpool's anthem 'You'll Never Walk Alone', was described on the government's website on a since-deleted page as "a Manchester United fan from the 80s."

If The EPL Season Ends Now, Will Clubs Still Get Relegated?

There is unlikely to be any relegation from the English Premier League if the season ends with no more play possible because of the coronavirus outbreak, Brighton and Hove Albion owner Tony Bloom has told British media. 

Premier League clubs met on Friday to discuss possible models for finishing the season but all options remained hypothetical after the U.K. government extended lockdown restrictions for another three weeks. Brighton were two points clear of the relegation zone with nine matches remaining when the league was brought to a halt on March 13. 

PSG's Layvin Kurzawa Has Lost His Damn Mind

A world without football is a world gone mad. That's the exact case with Layvin Kurzawa as he's clearly lost his mind after posting the most horrifying TikTok video I've seen in some time. I pray the Kurzawa TikTok saga doesn’t last too long.

Neymar's Mom Is Dating A 22-Year-Old TikTok Star

Neymar’s mother Nadine Gonçalves, 52, recently posted an intimate picture with her new boyfriend Tiago Ramos. Ramos is a gamer, TikTok person, model, and, oh, he's 22.

Nadine Gonçalves divorced Neymar Sr. in 2016 after being married for 25 years and raising Brazil and PSG superstar Neymar Jr.

‘You’re F***ing S***’: Celebrating 15 Years Of Bowyer And Dyer Bare-Knuckle Boxing

In many ways the 2004-05 Premier League season marked the beginning of Newcastle United’s fall from grace. Over the course of the previous three years, Newcastle had finished fourth, third and fifth while rubbing shoulders with the likes of Juventus, Inter and Barcelona in European competition.

But the excrement hit the air conditioning in ’04, beginning with an unproductive summer that saw Real Madrid poach Jonathan Woodgate while recruitment was defined by $10 million flop Jean-Alain Boumsong and the rapidly fading star of Patrick Kluivert.

Sports Illustrated Is Getting Slammed For Its Repugnant Firing Of Soccer Writer Grant Wahl Without Severance

You would be hard pressed to find a sportswriter in America who didn’t grow up reading Sports Illustrated. The iconic magazine brought the sports we love to life each week with superb writing and incredible photography.

Sadly, Sports Illustrated is being destroyed by The Maven, the company that now owns the publication.

A Letter To My Ex-Girlfriend: Football

Dear Football,

It has been nearly a month now since you left me. It felt like we were together for as long as I can remember, but suddenly you are no longer a part of my life. I write this letter to football to remind myself of all the fun times we had when we were united.

I think about you often. I remember waking up at god-awful-times in the morning just to see you. Now when I wake from my slumber on weekends I arise to an empty void without your presence. Our Tuesday and Wednesday afternoon Champions League rendezvous is a thing of the past.

Idiotic Belarusian Premier League Is Now Just Creepy

Words can’t describe how I feel about the Belarusian Premier League. Trying to play through a pandemic is one thing but putting fake fans in the stadium to boost the atmosphere is a whole new low. FC Dynamo Brest does get some creativity points for how the club carried it out, but the Belarus mannequin situation is also pretty creepy.

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