Humor

The18’s Super Bowl Preview: Which Kicker Is Going To Disappoint Everyone?

In a turn of events that no one could've predicted, Super Bowl LVI is the closest we'll ever get to an NFL championship game between the Cincinnati Bengals and Detroit Lions (it's Matthew Stafford's Los Angeles Rams, but you can pretend it's Detroit if you want). 

20-Year-Old Hacker Arrested For Repeatedly Siphoning Small Sums Of Money From Neymar's Bank Account

Brazilian police have arrested a man they believe hacked into Neymar’s bank accounts and repeatedly stole small sums of money amounting to more than $40,000, officials in São Paulo said.

Police said the alleged hacker worked at an unnamed bank where the Paris St Germain and Brazil player and his business manager father had accounts.

USWNT Shows Off Amazing Team Chemistry With Hilariously Weird Game

One of the most important aspects of sports is impossible to quantify and nearly undefinable. Team chemistry is often underrated in professional sports, but there’s no doubt any team works better together when people like each other, whether it’s an office or one of the best soccer teams of all time. 

To paraphrase the Supreme Court justice Potter Stewart when asked to define pornography, you know team chemistry when you see it. And we definitely see it with the U.S. women’s national team. 

I Cannot Stop Watching Joelinton Crack A Shot Into His Own Face

As a Newcastle United supporter, you might be curious (you're not) who my favorite player is. It's a tie between Allan Saint-Maximin and Joelinton. 

ASM represents everything that's beautiful about this game. He's a wizard on the dribble, capable of conjuring something out of nothing and always worth tuning in for. 

Big Joe isn't really any of those things. He's all heart, perseverance in the face of unmitigated failure and the inventor of the $54 million striker-turned-inside-midfield-destroyer position. 

80-Yard Volley In Brazil Is Understandably Getting Puskás Award Hype

The Campeonato Pernambucano — the state football championship of Pernambuco, Brazil — was the site of an unbelievable goal on Sunday from 21-year-old Salgueiro AC defender Lucão.

Up 1-0 shortly before halftime and facing pressure from Sete de Setembro, Lucão showed everyone that the quickest transition from defense into attack is simply an 80-yard volley from the middle of your own half that touches down inside the opponent's net. 

It's an effective way to beat the high-press that should be taught in academies across America — if Brazil's doing it, we should do it too.

The Thoughts And Notes Of A Spectator From 'The Coldest Game Ever'

The USMNT is one step away from qualifying for the World Cup after taking care of business on Wednesday night against an already eliminated Honduras side in "the coldest game ever."

I was on hand in Saint Paul to watch Kellyn Acosta again demonstrate why those who mocked his nomination for 2021 U.S. Soccer Male Player of the Year deserve to be ostracized from our country and to see Christian Pulisic exorcise that lecherous demon known as Thomas Tuchel.

Tim Akinola's Dundee Confusion And The Peculiar Link Between Scotland And Nigeria

A bit of confusion arose when Arsenal U-23 midfielder Tim Akinola received an offer for his first senior loan spell with Dundee United, and understandably so.

Watch: Denver Camel Has Better Touch On Wings Than Pulisic vs. Canada

The USMNT was humbled by a superior Canada 2-0 on Sunday in World Cup qualifying. The best American male player, Christian Pulisic, was largely ineffective during the massive showdown between the top two teams in Concacaf right now. The Chelsea winger attempted four dribbles, failing to complete a single one. 

Maybe Pulisic should’ve taken some notes from Sprout the camel.

Only Burnley Could Sign A New Striker And Immediately Cast Him As A Dinosaur In Jurassic Park

Nobody's cheering for the Public Investment Fund of Saudi Arabia. The backers of Newcastle United are the world's richest owners — their wealth, with regards to the global football market, is limitless. 

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