Just when you think you've seen it all on the football pitch, your neighbor comes puttering along on his scooter, bringing the match to a standstill, to complain about all the matchday malarkey that's frightening his horses.
Now you've really seen it all.
Based on how preposterously good Arsenal and Lionel Messi have been this season, there's only one possible explanation for their respective failures this week: tourist Kim Kardashian.
On Thursday, the 42-year-old socialite made her presence felt at the Emirates with her son Saint (the second-oldest of Kim and Kanye's four children). Cruising at the top of the Premier League table and targeting European glory, Arsenal suffered a shock elimination to a Sporting side that's sitting fourth in Liga Portugal.
If you think Emiliano Martinez is the most despicable goalkeeper out there, just wait to meet Zsombor Senkó, the man between the sticks for Hungarian second-division side DVTK. He's being rightly booed worldwide after denying a goal and crushing the dreams of a seven-year-old boy on his birthday!
Boooo! And another boooo!
The final season of Ted Lasso kicked off Wednesday with "Smells Like Mean Spirit" — a premiere centered around how AFC Richmond are being picked to finish last in the new Premier League season.
I would pick them to finish 20th too. It's the same squad that got relegated, they haven't made any transfers, Nate's gone and Ted's commitment to the entire thing is wavering. But no one's cared this much about preseason rankings since Josh Wolff laminated the MLS predictions and used it as straight gasoline for Austin FC's fire.
We learned all about the goodness of the Australia Cup last year when semi-professional side Sydney United 58 managed to reach the final, and the 2023 edition is off to a flying start in the preliminary rounds.
On Wednesday, Canberra Olympic FC played Tuggeranong United in the Canberra region of qualifying, and the action was so enthralling that a mob of kangaroos watched on from the touchline.
Cristiano Ronaldo's Al-Nassr beat Abha 3-1 in the King's Cup on Tuesday but it was a disappointing night for the Portuguese forward, who failed to score, received a yellow card and was substituted for the first time since his move to Saudi Arabia.
Ronaldo failed to score for the third consecutive game and is yet to open his account at Al-Nassr stadium.
The Ted Lasso Season 3 return date of Wednesday, March 15 on Apple TV Plus is upon us, and I've got five burning questions before watching the premiere. There are obviously spoilers below, so quickly binge Season 2 (like I did this past weekend) if you haven't already.
Otherwise, here are my thoughts before the final season of Ted Lasso.
#1. What is a fitting end to Ted Lasso's journey?
There are all sorts of stats and accolades that illustrate how talented Gavi is — the Golden Boy award, Spain's youngest goalscorer, the youngest World Cup scorer since Pelé — but he's a phenomenon best experienced live.
The sky might be falling on Barcelona (littered with fake cash featuring the word "MAFIA"), but Gavi's willing to take on that duel. "Lost cause" is not in the 18-year-old's lexicon.
With only nine matches remaining in the season, the battle to avoid relegation to Italy's third division is getting awfully serious in Serie B. The roll call of clubs teetering on the brink is pretty astonishing and includes recent Serie A competitors Venezia, Benevento, SPAL and Brescia.
Heading into Sunday, Cosenza sat dead last in 20th-place but hosted SPAL in a classic relegation six-pointer at Marulla Stadium. Cosenza desperately needed three points ahead of next weekend's trip to league leading Frosinone.