Ah, Germany, the land of order and organization, logic and reason. You know, or not.
We bring to you this alarming tweet from Bundesliga club Hamburger SV:
Wildpinkler unerwünscht! Nicht in unser Wohnzimmer!
Der Ordnungsdienst verweist Wildpinkler gemäß der Hausordnung des #Volksparkstadions pic.twitter.com/DXVlQjJBf5— Hamburger SV (@HSV) February 28, 2017
Apparently, the club's Volksparkstadion has been overrun by public urinators, roaming all over the place and peeing on everything. Also apparently, the German word for public urination is "wildpinkler". My life has been massively improved by this information. I hope yours has too.
The hell? Is HSV's stadium on a college campus? Doesn't it have bathrooms?
But seriously, HSV fans, stop peeing everywhere. There are rooms where you can go do your business. The German word for them is polizeiwachen.