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News

The18 Goes In The Tank For Tokyo Sexwale

Tokyo Sexwale is not going to win the FIFA presidential election. This is the case for a variety of reasons, mostly because he's barely even campaigning and even his own continent has pledged its support for someone else.

But we would not be doing our civic duty as an esteemed media organization if we did not interrupt what we're sure would have been a very fine and productive day with our ill-informed and quite honestly pointless thoughts on the FIFA election.

Five candidates remain in the race to replace Sepp Blatter, whose book with Stephen Colbert, "I Am Corrupt (And So Can You!)" is surely hitting stores soon.

So here is our position: The18 is officially endorsing Tokyo Sexwale for FIFA President. And, yes, we know Sexwale has roughly the same chance of becoming FIFA President as he does of becoming a unicorn, or a vampire. We are endorsing him anyway.

We are endorsing Sexwale because he seems like the least worst candidate in the race. Let's run down his competitors real quick:

Gianni Infantino: basically a FIFA stooge. The current general secretary of UEFA, it's a good bet he's as mixed up in all this garbage as anyone.

Prince Ali: Really campaigning hard for reform, and the only person who ran against Blatter this summer. Also thinks that Qatar hosting the World Cup is totally a good idea.

Sheikh Salman: Has been accused of human rights violations involving the torture of athletes during the Arab Spring. So, basically, he's even worse than the people who were alreadly leading FIFA. The current frontrunner (obviously).

Jerome Champagne: See "Gianni Infantino." 

Sexwale's main case to be FIFA president: he was buds with Nelson Mandela, but hey, anyone who Nelson Mandela was cool with is all right by us.

Besides Sexwale, Prince Ali would seem to be the next-least-corrupt candidate, which is to say there's little chance of him winning either. The race will likely come down to Sheikh Salman vs. Gianni Infantino, with Prince Ali as the dark horse.

The good news is that on February 26, FIFA will have a new president and he will not be Sepp Blatter, beyond that, hopes for real reform, whie encouraged, are probably in vain. The real reform candidates have about as much chance as real reform candidates do anywhere, which is to say it isn't looking good.

We're still rooting for Tokyo Sexwale though. 

Contact The18 Staff Writer Sam Klomhaus at Klomhaus@The18.com or follow him on Twitter @SamKlomhaus

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