Appearances can be deceiving. For instance, Phil Jones doesn’t look like anything special. When he plays the beautiful game, he often ostensibly looks worried that something will go terribly wrong. I, myself, like to imagine that a soccer ball has seriously embarrassed him at so many points throughout his life, that he suffers from a crippling PTSD-like fear whenever the ball comes near. Observe:
I call this one, "Surprise." Photo: @_PhilJones_ | Twitter
And this, this I call, "Abject Fear." Photo: @unknownsock_zar | Twitter
Those eyes have seen horros the likes of which you and I will never know. Photo: @learoymallion | Twitter
But I’m an Arsenal fan. The fact is that Phil Jones is special, and I couldn’t help but notice his qualities during this past weekend’s Arsenal-Manchester United clash. There was one play in particular that cemented his brilliance, his transcendental ability to do what ever it is that Phil Jones does. That day, Phil Jones did a tackle with his head, who knows what he will do next?
I believe that, to some extent, I have come to understand Phil Jones. Phil Jones is unique, unafraid to travel his own path, and unbound by such a trivial notion as “this is the way it’s always been done.” Explaining further would require blatantly steeling from a well established meme — but I already took those other pictures off of the inter-webs, so I doubt anyone will get mad.
Here is a metaphorical representation of Phil Jones’ mindset when it comes to soccer. One that has been forged by countless tackles, and headers, and maybe even a little abject fear. His logic isn’t bound by our society’s ideals. He is truly transcendent, and that has, quite simply, made him not make a whole lot of sense sometimes. Behold:
Photo: @DailyStar_Sport | Twitter
It always do, Phil. It always do.
Follow me on Twitter: @yelty
