I don't know anything. This was clearly demonstrated to me today when a friend told me to check out Portugal's mannequin challenge. First off, I had no idea how to spell mannequin, and I thought I was on top of my spelling. This isn't an auspicious beginning.
Second, what the hell is the mannequin challenge? I guess the video will explain that. I hope it's funny.
Espectacular vídeo, excepto el que da la nota. Madre mía Cristiano... #MannequinChallenge #lamentable #ego pic.twitter.com/39znovrUtL
— Carles Fité (@CarlesFite) November 12, 2016
Oh, okay! What the f***, this is what we're doing now? Recreating Madame Tussauds because we're so bored with this planet? We've seen better centuries, no doubt. While we're most in love with spectacles of disintegration, at least we now have this unshakable image of what it's like in Portugal's locker room: a lot of dudes going about their business while a nearly naked Cristiano Ronaldo wildly flexes and screams.
WTF is going on.