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Francesco Totti Hits A Volley So Hard That It Would’ve Destroyed Carthage

Francisco Totti’s thunderous training volley put an end to the Third Punic War today. The volley cracked off his boot and resulted in a breaching of the Carthaginian's walls and the sacking of the city. When this firecracker smote the back of the net, Carthage was systematically burned for 17 days, utterly destroying all remnants of the 700-year-old empire.

Totti celebrated by plowing over the city and sowing it with salt, ensuring that Carthage would trouble the Roman Republic no more. 

Only nine matches remain in the Serie A season for Roma, and Totti’s career could soon be drawing to a close with no certainty of another one-year extension. 

With Roma trailing Lazio 2-0 in the Copa Italia semifinals, it would be beyond lit to see him start the second leg.

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