After watching first Lucas Biglia and then Enzo Perez do little except play balls into places where things go to die, it’s looking like Argentina’s riding Ever Banega next to Javier Mascherano from here on out (which still might not be very long whatsoever). Regardless, my God was it nice to see a ball from the Argentina midfield that wasn’t first coated in the feces of a leaky Mascherano anus.
It’s been 36 years of waiting for Peruvians to see La Blanquirroja at a World Cup. Their first two matches at the tournament were nothing short of heartbreak. Their first match was a dominating performance against Denmark that will forever be remembered for Christian Cueva’s horrendous penalty miss. Peru lost 1-0. Their next match against powerhouse France was more of the same, as no Peru goal developed and the country's World Cup dreams ended.
Portugal struggled to break down the stout defense of Team Melli for about 45 minutes. Then came the absurd Ricardo Quaresma goal vs Iran to flip the tie on its head.
In February, we crowned Quaresma the King of the Trivela. The Besiktas winger brought his beautiful technique with him to Russia and scored what may be the most sumptuous goal of the World Cup thus far.
Who wants to play Russia? Who wants to play Uruguay?!
Not Morocco. The already-eliminated side has been one of the better looking teams at the World Cup, but the Atlas Lions had yet to score or get points at this World Cup heading into its final group match. That’s soccer for you.
But after all the misfortune, Morocco finally had some luck go its way.
A rare fib between former El Clasico rivals Andres Iniesta and Sergio Ramos led to a break away for Khalid Boutaïb. David de Gea was looking to make his first save of the tournament, but Boutaïb finished with poise.
Rumors have been swirling around the Egypt camp that Mohamed Salah could quit international football after the World Cup. The Liverpool star, according to reports, has been unhappy with the way he’s been singled out surrounding a photo he took with the leader of the Chechen Republic. After the Mo Salah goal vs Saudi Arabia on Monday did not elicit any celebration from the Pharaohs’ star man, there may be some truth to the rumor.
This was not the start Russia was looking for against the grizzly bear trap that is Uruguay. 10 minutes into Monday’s match, Luis Suarez buried a free kick from just outside the box by going low around the wall and just inside Igor Akinfeev’s far post.
The goal was greatly aided by Russian T-34 tank Sergei Ignashevich. You can tell that the 38-year-old was only trying to aid his keeper by clearing Edinson Cavani out of his sight lines, but it really just made an almighty clusterfuck in front of goal while Suarez curled in his precise finish.
England’s putting on a finishing clinic versus Panama to begin Sunday’s World Cup group play. John Stones sent a precise downward header beyond Jaime Penedo to open the scoring, Harry Kane added England’s second with an emphatic penalty and Jesse Lingard added the third with one of the best goals of the tournament so far. A second from Stones and another Kane penalty has England up 5-0 at the half.
Here’s the opener from Stones.