Confirmed Transfers

Kolo Toure Has A New Club, And That's Great

It's over and done. Kolo Toure has left Liverpool, and he isn't coming back. He's gone to Celtic, where he will presumably get way more playing time and become the most entertaining player in green and white since Thomas Gravesen left.

I'm trying to not be sad, because Kolo wouldn't want me to be sad.

Three Years After Becoming The Most Hated Man In Dortmund, Mario Gotze Is Returning

In April of 2013, Mario Gotze became the most hated man in Dortmund after it was announced that Gotze, a product of Dortmund’s youth academy, would be transferring to fierce rivals Bayern Munich. 

The timing of the announcement did little to help Gotze’s cause — it emerged on the eve of a momentous Champions League semi-final against Real Madrid. Munich had met Gotze’s release clause of €37 million and the midfielder was keen to play under Pep Guardiola, much to the annoyance of then BVB manager Jurgen Klopp.

Manchester United On The Verge Of Smashing World Transfer Record For Paul Pogba

After seeing their $115 million offer for Paul Pogba swiftly declined by Juventus, Manchester United have reportedly returned with an improved offer of nearly $122 million. 

Zinedine Zidane Is Bringing His Sons On Tour With Real Madrid, But He Doesn't Want To Bring Martin Odegaard

17-year-old phenom Martin Odegaard’s standing with the Real Madrid first team just became that much more confusing. The latest reports from the Santiago Bernabeu allege that Real Madrid club president Florentino Perez has forced manager Zinedine Zidane to include Odegaard in the club’s pre-season tour against Zidane’s wishes.

Martin Skrtel Transfers From Liverpool To Fenerbahce

I love center back highlight videos. I am not sure why this is, but I can't get enough.

This one is perhaps my favorite. It depicts Martin Skrtel and Mamadou Sakho as a pair of warrior gods who defend Liverpool's goal and honor against all comers and defeat them with ease.

Chivas Legend Omar Bravo Signs For NASL's Carolina RailHawks

(Extremely The Wire voice) Look out, NASL. Omar's comin'. Mexican striker Omar Bravo, formerly of Chivas, has joined the NASL's Carolina RailHawks.

Bravo will join the seventh-place RailHawks in hopes of bolstering their attack. Having scored more than 150 goals in his professional career, we like his chances.

30-Year-Old Journeyman Becomes Fifth-Highest Paid Footballer In The World

Graziano Pelle, who scored 11 Premier League goals in 30 appearances for Southampton last season, is about to make as much money as Zlatan Ibrahimovic after accepting a transfer to Chinese side Shandong Luneng. 

The Italian international had been wanted by the likes of Chelsea and Everton, but he’s decided to leave Southampton in a £13 million transfer while signing a contract that will pay him £13.6 million per year for two years.

The Next Pirlo May Soon Be Playing In Spain

Jorge Sampaoli has just arrived in Sevilla after leading Chile to their 2015 Copa America title, but his plans for the club’s upcoming season are already running full steam ahead. 

The former Chile manager, he resigned in January of 2016, watched with pride as La Roja once again captured the Copa this June. Now, he will be looking to match their success with his own at Sevilla.

Managing Sevilla will be the biggest club test of Sampaoli’s coaching career, and it’s an excellent opportunity to prove that he’s one of the finer managers in the world. 

Borussia Dortmund Are Super Salty Henrikh Mkhitaryan Left

Henrikh Mkhitaryan should not be blamed for moving to Manchester United from Borussia Dortmund. He gets to play for a larger club, be more famous and reportedly triple his wages. That's a no-brainer for just about anybody.

His former club doesn't see it that way though.

Borussia Dortmund announced on their Facebook page that Mkhitaryan was leaving the club, and they couldn't resist throwing a little jab at the departing midfielder.

Here's the post in full (bolding mine):

Zlatan Is Officially Moving To Manchester United

And here I thought today was going to be a slow news day. Zlatan Ibrahimovic announced Thursday his next destination will be Manchester United, where he will be reunited with his coach at Inter Milan, Jose Mourinho.

The move has been speculated for quite a while, basically since he announced he was leaving PSG, but Zlatan made it official Thursday on Instagram. Premier League center-backs are on notice.