Social Media

You Can't Just Pee Wherever You Want In Hamburg's Stadium

Ah, Germany, the land of order and organization, logic and reason. You know, or not.

We bring to you this alarming tweet from Bundesliga club Hamburger SV:

Mix Diskerud Wrote A Poem About NYCFC

Mix Diskerud may not be long for the city that never sleeps, if a poem he posted on Instagram is any indication.

At least if the whole soccer thing doesn't work out, which from the looks of the poem it might not, he'll have a future in brooding and smoking some kind of obscure, disgusting tobacco.

David McCracken Works Out In Traffic . . . In The Middle Of A Snowstorm

Falkirk captain David McCracken found himself stranded on a highway in the middle of a traffic jam caused by UK’s latest snowstorm. Storm Doris prevented McCracken from attending his club’s morning training session. Despite the snow covered highway, the 35-year-old decided to make the most out of the problematic situation. 

Determined to get his workout in, the Scottish footballer ditched his vehicle and started stretching in-between the surrounding cars, which we're now calling the David McCracken Snowstorm Workout.

Feast Your Eyes On Cristiano Ronaldo Sitting On A Bugatti Veyron

As a flashy rich person, Cristiano Ronaldo obviously owns a lot of cool cars, but there is no car cooler than the Bugatti Veyron. The Veyron is the second-fastest street-legal car in the world and is capable of killing a driver who isn't careful in an instant. It's also, at a cool $1.5 million, so expensive urchin sportswriters like me aren't even allowed to look at it in person.

But that's why we have Cristiano Ronaldo, who has no problem buying such a car and showing it to his legions of adoring fans via social media.

Conan O'Brien Meets Giovani Dos Santos To Show Him The Ways Of "El Gato"

I'm going to be honest, I haven't watched Conan O'Brien in ages, although Late Night with Conan O'Brien was a staple of my younger years. If there's one thing that Conan does better than any other host, it's getting outside the studio and messing with people. 

Mamadou Sakho Is Holding A Lion In Dubai Because His Life Is Better Than Yours

Most high-profile footballers live decadent lives, mostly playing a child's game in front of thousands of fawning fans and lounging on boats in exotic locations. Crystal Palace central defender Mamadou Sakho (on loan from Liverpool) takes that to a whole new level.

With Crystal Palace not in action this weekend, Sakho used his break time to go to the United Arab Emirates and do some cool stuff. Here he is holding a lion:

David Luiz Lays Out Chelsea TV Reporter

David Luiz is no stranger to being absolutely hilarious. He used to combine his nuance for comedy both on and off the pitch, but now that’s he’s strictly business in defense for Chelsea, we’ve been limited to moments like this one here.

Shot-Stopping Hero Dad And Son Get To Visit Burnley Training Ground

Adam Haworth and his superdad were invited to the Barnfield Training Center, home of Burnley FC, after the video of Adam’s dad saving his son from an errant shot went viral last Sunday. 

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