Manchester United

Sergio Ramos is set to sign a new contract with Real Madrid, according to reports featured by ESPN, after negotiations take place on Thursday.  

Ramos has been the subject of repeated rumors linking him with a move to Manchester United. In fact, the cavalcade of gossip this month has been so much that anyone not initiated with tittle-tattle of a transfer window might actually believe that a transfer to the Red Devils is closer to happening than not.

While the brain trust at The18 has long argued that Manchester United have more pressing personnel matters to deal with at the other end of the pitch, Louis van Gaal has been insistent since United’s pre-season tour of America that what he needs most is “speed and creativity” up front.

Yaya Toure's second goal against West Brom Monday was nice, but he didn't get Manchester City's best goal of the week. That went to Toni Duggan, who became the first woman to win Manchester City's "Goal of the Season" award with this volley against Chelsea last year:

Angel Di Maria has written an open letter to Manchester United after having completed his big money move to Paris Saint-Germain, ostensibly in order to smooth things over with a fan base that holds him in just slightly higher regard than Radamel Falcao, which is to say it doesn’t like him. 

The letter is professional, and makes it clear that he is really sorry for failing to live up to expectations. 

To Manchester United:

Cristiano Ronaldo’s transfer from Manchester United to Real Madrid was without a doubt one of the greatest and most drawn-out transfer sagas in football history, and it all began shortly after Manchester United rise to the top of the world as newly crowned 2008 European Champions.

It’s a great time to be VfL Wolfsburg’s Kevin De Bruyne, shocking misses aside. He has just won the German Supercup for the second year running, beating Bayern Munich both times, no less. He is arguably the most sought after attacking midfielder in the world, and his play each and every week seems to only increase interest in him. He is the top dog in a very good team, and it seems that he is also aware and responsible for his actions, or at least that is what his latest words imply. 

While he’s yet to dot his two I’s, it’s as certain as low wages at Walmart that Angel di Maria will sign a contract with Paris St Germain in the coming days. Less than 12 months after shelling out a British record £59.7 million for the Argentine Champions League winner, Manchester United are expected to agree to a fee of around £45 million that will see the former Real Madrid midfielder cross the English Channel.

Zlatan Ibrahimovic says what he feels all of the time, and a lot of the time that involves letting someone know that he is better than them. 

When asked who he thought was the best looking woman in the world, he responded, “I don’t know, but when I find her I will date her.”

He’s arrogant, there is no getting around that, but hearing his ignorance it is hard to not think of a famous Muhammad Ali quote: it’s not bragging if you can back it up. 

There have been rumors abounding lately that a certain tall Swedish PSG striker is going to make a move to Manchester United.

(Jay Z voice) Let's end the speculation I'm talkin' to all of y'all.

Zlatan is not going to Manchester United. Zlatan doesn't like Louis van Gaal.

Here is a section of a Sports Illustrated interview from last year. (the whole interview is worth a read):