This Manager's Response To Ultras Who Attacked His Son Is Savage

OK, so the image above doesn't actually have Henrik Larsson in it, or savage dogs, which might make this all seem a bit misleading, but it's not. I promise. You see, that picture is actually of Henrik Larsson's son, Jordan Larsson. The elder Larsson is manager of Helsingborg, and the younger Larsson is a player. 

Helsingborg just got relegated from the Swedish first division. The above picture is of Helsingborg ultras running on the field and trying to rip Jordan Larsson's jersey off.

The UEFA Team Of The Year Shortlist Includes A Lot Of Good Players And Joe Allen

The UEFA Team of the Year shortlist has been released. Most of the usual suspects are there (Manuel Neuer is a rather glaring omission). Lionel Messi is there. Neymar is there. Cristiano Ronaldo, Luis Suarez and Gareth Bale are there.

And, um, so is Joe Allen.

Yes that Joe Allen.

Wayne Rooney Is Not The First Footballer Ever To Be Drunk, So Everyone Relax

Let's start by saying that by no way or means do we endorse any sort of substance abuse. And yet, it is hard to argue with the argument Jurgen Klopp put forward when he was asked a question regarding Wayne Rooney reportedly being drunk at a wedding. 

Ronaldo Scores 44th Career Hat Trick (Watch)

After today's Atletico Madrid vs Real Madrid derby, many of you may be asking, "Exactly how many hat-tricks does Cristiano Ronaldo have?"

You may also be asking, "Can anyone else score for Real Madrid?"

The answer to these questions is, respectively, a sh*t ton and no. To put it in perspective, Ronaldo is scoring hat-tricks at the same rate at which I consume breakfast sandwiches. Which is to say, very frequently.

Here's how it breaks down.

Tottenham Pursue Brilliant All-Harry Strategy To Win London Derby

We haven't seen this much magic since J.K. Rowling wrapped up her 7-book series.

In a stunning last-minute victory, Tottenham scored two goals in four minutes to steal three points from West Ham in today's London Derby.

To be fair, it was two different Harrys who left West Ham standing around, stunned, looking like a bunch of muggles at the end of the match. 

In the early minutes of the second half, it was 20-year-old Harry Winks who created some magic as he put away his first Premier League goal in his Premier League debut:

Radamel Falcao Was Once The Most Dangerous Striker In The World. He's Coming Back.

Radamel Falcao used to be the most feared striker in the world. That's not an exaggeration. At the height of his powers, he was feared more than Suarez, more than Lewandowski and more than Benzema.

In his last season at Atletico Madrid, the Colombian scored 28 goals in 34 appearances. In fact, he ranked right behind Messi and Ronaldo as one of the best players on the planet.

Just check out Falcao's stats below.


Bastian Schweinsteiger Says He's Ready To Play For Manchester United, But He Probably Won't

Bastian Schweinsteiger is not having a good year. We think. It's hard to be sure. We haven't seen much of him, really. Schweimsteiger hasn't appeared for Manchester United yet this season, and most people don't think that'll change.

Bastian Schweinsteiger, though, isn't most people. He's Bastian Schweinsteiger, and he's ready for action whenever Jose Mourinho needs him.


Steven Gerrard Can Help Reverse The Trend Of Failing English Managers

Steven Gerrard, 36, made it clear at the beginning of 2016 that it would likely be his last year as a player. That statement is now on the verge of coming true. 

His contract with the Galaxy is up, and he’s announced that his MLS career is over. Gerrard, the former captain of Liverpool, has always been a larger than life figure. He could always be counted on to deliver at clutch moments, but he’s also been hindered by a sporting egotism that often left supporters feeling let down.