Outrageous

CBS Is Making It Hard As Hell To Watch The Champions League

Editor's Note: This story is for the end of the 2019-20 season. For the 2020-2021 season, read here.

There was a time, back before Tommy Smyth began broadcasting into our homes on weekday afternoons, that it was all but impossible to find European soccer on TV in the U.S. 

The Ballad Of Michelle Akers And The Rabid Bobcat

Lemme sing y’all a little song about the legend of Michelle Akers, all based entirely on true events ripped straight from her Instagram timeline.

*classic guitar strums*

Once upon a time in the pre-NWSL U.S.,
women’s soccer was dominated by a lanky, curly haired lass. 

Michelle Akers did it all way back when,
she shared FIFA Player of the Century with China’s Sun Wen.

She won two World Cups and one gold medal,
not too shabby for a girl from just outside Seattle.

Portland Timbers Vs. FC Cincinnati: Which Team Committed The More Apocalyptic Error?

In 2019, FC Cincinnati stunk up MLS with a negative-44 goal differential and tied for the fourth-most amount of losses in a single season in MLS history. This season didn’t show much promise either as the club had to hire a new head coach after former coach Ron Jans resigned in February following allegations of using a racial slur in front of players.

NWSL Star Shea Groom Gave Budweiser Its Greatest Advertisement Yet

The Houston Dash won their first NWSL title with a 2-0 victory over the Chicago Red Stars in the Challenge Cup final on Sunday in Utah. Shea Groom, a journeywoman midfielder who joined the Dash in the offseason, was named MVP of the final after scoring the second goal, rounding USWNT keeper Alyssa Naeher to seal the win.

Danilo Has To Remind FIFA Of His Existence And To Stop Fanboying Over Cristiano Ronaldo

Juventus and Brazil left back Danilo offered FIFA his two cents while the governing body’s Twitter page was busy drooling over Cristiano Ronaldo.

Major League Spicy: Watch As I Torture Myself With Jalapeños

One idiotic night an idea came to me that I now regret in every way, shape and form. The concept was to spice up Major League Soccer coverage with the addition of hot peppers. Little did I know that I would soon enter a hellhole of pain, heart burn and the loss of taste buds.

The Philadelphia Union may have defeated the New England Revolution 1-0, but the real loser was the moron watching with the jalapeños.

Zarek Valentin Finally Explains Why He Was Caught With His Hands Down His Pants On National TV

As we get ready for the start of the MLS Is Back Tournament knockout rounds, which begin Saturday night, it’s hard not to look back at the craziest moment of the group stage, one we’re still struggling to wrap our heads around.

MLS Effect: Even NFL Teams Are Following Boring European Naming Standards Now

It’s been a big week for wealthy team owners giving money to overpaid marketing folks to come up with new names for sports teams. From Washington, D.C., to Seattle, Washington, new names have been announced in some of America’s most popular sports. 

As much as we love soccer here at The18, we’re a bit disappointed that the NHL is winning in the naming department this week.

Birmingham City Retires Number 22 For Player That Played One Season

The hype and excitement around 17-year-old Jude Bellingham reached its apex when Borussia Dortmund made it official that the teenager was leaving Birmingham City to join the German giant. 

Bellingham is full of talent, especially his ability on the ball and propensity to evade players. His highlight reel emphasizes his skill with the ball at his feet. The midfielder caught the eye of several big teams with Dortmund snatching him up for a Birmingham City record fee of nearly $26 million. 

Professional Party Pooper Pulisic Comes Up Just Short Of Ruining Liverpool's Big Day

Christian Pulisic tried everything in his power to be the “Johnny Raincloud” for Liverpool on the day where the Reds would lift the Premier League trophy for the first time in club history. And damn did Pulisic come close.

The American sat on the bench for the start of the match and had to watch Liverpool open the floodgates in the first half with three goals in the span of 20 minutes. 

The scoring frenzy began with Naby Keïta picking up Willian’s loose touch and going for top bins with a thunderbolt of a strike.

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