Italy

Nine goals. Nine. Four goals for Inter, five for Fiorentina. I think it’s fair to say that no one expected that. Elsewhere, Juventus demolished Genoa with four goals and no reply. Expected. Lazio rumbled right over Palermo, going five-nil up in thirty minutes and finishing the game six to one. Expected. Napoli drew two apiece away at Sassuolo. Not that expected, to be honest, but not that shocking. But Fiorentina five, Inter four? That’s a result that makes you sit up and take notice.

As FC Barcelona discovered last Wednesday, one does not simply mess with the Juventus defense. On Sunday, Juve hosted lowly Genoa at Juventus Stadium with the opportunity to stretch their lead at the top of Serie A to 11 points before Monday’s meeting between Roma and Pescara.

Deadlines are interesting things. For Milan in recent weeks – in recent years, really – a flurry of deadlines have been dodged, avoided, missed, and ignored. In the past seven days, however, everything seems have slotted into place. The impending deadline for the sale of one of the world’s most storied clubs to a shady Chinese investment firm was finally completed, ending the ownership of a shadiest of shady owners himself, Silvio Berlusconi.

At last, Yonghong Li’s Rossoneri Sport Investment Lux has completed the purchase of AC Milan from Silvio Berlusconi’s Fininvest. The deal values AC Milan at 740 million euros, which includes the club’s debt of 220 million. 

It seems like every week, we talk about Napoli. Despite them being only third in the table, they’re generating a huge amount of column inches at the moment. As fate would have it, Napoli’s fixture list has thrown up a string of vital matches, back to back to back. There was the Real Madrid tie, the double header against Juventus, and a perpetual chase to stay in the top three and secure Champions League football for another year.

Giorgio Chiellini has had a good go of this "professional footballer" thing but everyone knows the real money is in business. That's why it was a wise choice for Chiellini to set himself up for the future by getting his MBA from the University of Turin.

Many doors have opened with this degree. Chiellini can go into finance, sales, marketing, management, systems analysis, systems administration, operations or even entrepreneurship.

In Naples, they have a book for interpreting dreams. La Smorfia, translated as "the Grimace," provides the user with guidance, teaching them to take their night time adventures and turn them into a series of numbers. You can then use these numbers to play the lottery. For instance, should you dream of Italy or of God, then you should pick the number one. If you dream of a deranged person, then number 22 is particularly auspicious.

If you have a nightmare, then you should be selecting the number ninety. Using your dreams, you can predict the future.

The drawn out sale of AC Milan has seemingly reached a breakthrough. Elliott Management, a United States-based hedge fund, has agreed to finance a large portion of the remaining capital owed to Silvio Berlusconi’s current ownership group Fininvest. Elliott has provided an essential assist to Rossoneri Sport Investment Lux (sharing AC Milan’s nickname but unrelated to the club), Chinese investor Yonghong Li’s investment vehicle leading the AC Milan purchase. 

Today marks a historic day in football as Francesco Totti made his Roma debut against Brescia on March 28, 1993. Over the following 24 years, Totti has appeared in 612 league games and scored 250 goals. 

He’ll forever be remembered for leading Roma to their first Serie A title since 1982-83 in 2001, and the now 40-year-old is still going strong with two league goals from 11 matches this campaign.

Francisco Totti’s thunderous training volley put an end to the Third Punic War today. The volley cracked off his boot and resulted in a breaching of the Carthaginian's walls and the sacking of the city. When this firecracker smote the back of the net, Carthage was systematically burned for 17 days, utterly destroying all remnants of the 700-year-old empire.

Che bomba del Capitano!