Humor

Petition To Make Nelly Furtado’s 2004 ‘Força’ The Official Song Of Every Euro

LCD Soundsystem’s song “tonite” begins with a lyric that could be applicable to every UEFA European Championship anthem ever written. “Everybody’s singing the same song,” James Murphy laments. “It goes ‘tonight, tonight, tonight, tonight, tonight, tonight.’ I never realized these artists thought so much about dying.”

What The World Looked Like The Last Time The USMNT Beat Mexico

The U.S. men's national team defeated Mexico in a highly contested match on Sunday to win the CONCACAF Nations League, marking the country’s first competitive victory over its rivals since September 10th, 2013.

The fruitless streak continued so long that I personally graduated middle school, high school and was just one year away from graduating college before the U.S. was victorious again. Christian Pulisic, the American captain who scored the go-ahead goal, was just 14 years old when the U.S. last claimed victory. 

Incoming! Pitch Invader From The Sky Crashes Game In Poland, Gets Yellow Card

A fifth-tier game in Elblag, Poland, had an unexpected visitor from the sky. In the 65th minute of a Polish soccer game, a man with a parachute gracefully landed on the field to the surprise of everyone.

That USMNT-Mexico Game Was So Crazy That A Fan Parkouring Off The CBS Set Wasn’t Big News

Sunday night’s Concacaf Nations League final between the United States and Mexico was the craziest game I have ever seen. Period.

The game had everything on and off the field, including a fan parkouring off the Paramount+ set to evade security. The fact that a fan taking a plunge into the stands from the broadcast booth isn’t big news goes to show how nutty this Concacaf classic was.

Player Gives Away Handball Penalty While Appealing For Handball On Opponent

Having lost the KNVB Cup final in 2014, 2017 and 2018, PSV Women must’ve thought their cursed existence in the competition was rearing its ugly head again in the 2021 final on Saturday.

In the 17th minute, PSV set about defending a Den Haag corner. The ball eventually fell to Den Haag’s Jannette van Belen, whose attempted shot was blocked and ricocheted back off the top of her shoulder. 

What Would You Ask Pulisic If You Had One Question? Well, Here’s What My Goofy Ass Asked

Imagine you get to ask the first American male to win the UEFA Champions League one singular question. What would you ask? Christian Pulisic is sitting there on the other end of the Zoom call staring into your soul awaiting your question. The pressure is on.

This was the situation I found myself in on Wednesday. Concacaf was kind enough to give me — an aspiring 22-year-old sports media graduate who just finished college last month — media accreditation to attend Nations League press conferences and the semifinal matches.

CONCACAF Stretcher Girls Steal The Show From USA-Honduras Nations League Clash

Still awake? The USMNT and Honduras did battle in the Concacaf Nations League semifinals for a grueling 90 minutes on Thursday with the U.S. claiming a 1-0 victory. The game featured at least five Honduras players being taken out on a stretcher (they magically healed and were quick to get back on the field). The fact that four Concacaf stretcher girls produced the most noise from the crowd is a testament to the overall performance.

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