Highlights

The Portland Thorns edged the Seattle Reign 2-1 in the first NWSL semifinal on Saturday at Providence Park in Portland, a second straight victory over their rivals to advance to the NWSL championship game on Sept. 22. 

Tobin Heath had a goal (and another called back) while Lindsey Horan headed in the winner in the 76th minute. It was a deserved win for a home side that had tremendous support from its fans, who will get to see their team go for a second straight title back at Providence Park against either North Carolina or Chicago. 

Welcome to the Netherlands, Érick Gutiérrez. 

Gutiérrez, a Mexico international midfielder, reunited with former Pachuca winger Hirving Lozano in the Eredivisie when PSV Eindhoven signed the 23-year-old just before the transfer deadline in August. 

He made his debut on Saturday, coming on as a substitute against ADO Den Haag. 

Five minutes later, he had assisted his compatriot and scored a cracking goal. 

Manchester City had little trouble with Fulham on Saturday. The Citizens scored less than two minutes into each half and cruised to a 3-0 win. One enchanting piece of Bernardo Silva control summed up Manchester City’s dominance.

Leroy Sané, David Silva and Raheem Sterling all scored for Pep Guardiola’s side, but the team’s loveliest piece of play came from the diminutive Portuguese maestro. 

Liverpool was pretty good last year, if you’ll recall. Jurgen Klopp’s side reached the Champions League final and only Manchester City had fewer losses in Premier League play. 

This year, the Reds look even better.

The 2018-19 UEFA Women’s Champions League Round of 32 kicked off Wednesday with the likes of Lyon (the three-time defending champion), Chelsea, Wolfsburg, PSG and Linkoping all recording first leg victories.

The most resounding scoreline was Bayern Munich traveling to Serbia to take on Spartak Subotica and winning 7-0. The opening goal of the match was scored by 33-year-old American Gina Lewandowski (no relation to Robert). She previously won this competition with Frankfurt back in 2008, but she has only one USWNT cap to her name.

Excuse me, I have to type this so quietly because Croatia’s hungover as all hell at the moment, and I daren’t wake it. Today, Croatia opened its eyes in Elche before quickly closing them and muttering, “I think I’m going to die. I don’t think partying for 58 days straight was a good idea.” 

That’s the amount of time that’s elapsed between the nation’s runners-up finish at the World Cup and today’s 6-0 beatdown at the hands of La Furia Roja — a nickname which certainly sounds like the sort of Fireball Cinnamon Whisky product that’d do your head in. 

With Chile in Suwon for an international friendly against South Korea, 24-year-old midfielder Diego Valdes, who plays his club ball for Morelia in Liga MX, played the most abhorrent sort of tourist while posing for a photograph with a South Korean fan using the derogatory ‘slant-eyed’ gesture.

Portugal defeated Italy 1-0 Monday at the Estadio da Luz in Lisbon to go top of UEFA Nations League Group 3 while Italy crashed to the bottom of the three-team group with only one point from two matches. The Azzurri’s worrisome 1-1 draw with Poland in Bologna last Friday served to foreshadow the day’s events: Italy mustered only two shots on target while creating absolutely nothing of note.

A team of Cruz Azul legends played a friendly against Club America legends in a farewell match to Estadio Azul Saturday, which was America’s home between 1947 and 1955 and Azul’s ground between 1996 and 2018. Both clubs now occupy the Estadio Azteca while the Nuevo Estadio Azul is being built.

But this past weekend, the likes of Azul legends Carlos Hermosillo and César Delgado came up against Blanco, Luis Roberto Alves and Germán Villa to give the crumbling edifice a proper goodbye.