Goals

Carlos Tevez Remains An Absolute Animal At Club Level

Boca Juniors retained their place at the top of the Argentine Primera Division table by defeating rivals River Plate in the Superclasico on Sunday. Carlos Tevez was instrumental in Boca’s success, scoring a brace and registering his sixth assist in 10 league appearances in their 4-2 victory at River Plate’s El Monumental stadium.

This Weekend's Top Goal Was A Nasty Scissor Volley From Croatia

We don’t often cover the Croatian Prva HNL, but when we do, it’s usually to provide you with news of an absolute banger. Hilal Soudani, an Algerian international, scored this ridiculous scissor volley against Lokomotiva Zagreb on Sunday.

Dinamo won the Zagreb derby 3-1, rebounding nicely after completing a Champions League campaign that saw them accumulate zero wins, six defeats and a goal difference of minus 15. 

(H/T: World Soccer

Jonathan Dos Santos Scores As Villarreal Hammer Atletico Madrid In La Liga

Atletico Madrid, in their second game since manager Diego Simeone confirmed he intends to leave them for Inter Milan someday, played like a team whose manager had recently said he intends to leave them someday. Villarreal had much less trouble scoring than would be expected against one of the world's best defensive teams.

Justin Bieber Joins Neymar And Rafinha On The Pitch

Check out what happened when Justin Bieber dropped in at Camp Nou to play some football with Neymar. He is actually pretty good (maybe not surprisingly after we uncovered this video of him juggling with Neymar earlier this year).

Given that Neymar and Bieber appear to be fast friends, we expect to see more Bieber soccer highlights soon.

Scotland’s Goal Of The Month Is A Sublime Chip From An Amputee Footballer

Amputee footballer Tommy McKay, a diehard supporter of Scottish football club Dundee United, won the Scottish Premiership’s Goal of the Month for November with this wonderful chip at halftime during Dundee’s match against Dunfermline.

Edinson Cavani Is Actually Good

Look at what this fool Edinson Cavani did.

Raul Jimenez Scores In Benfica Loss, They Advance To UCL Knockout Stage Anyway

Benfica needed either a win against Napoli or a Besiktas loss to Dynamo Kiev Tuesday to advance to the Champions League knockout stage. They lost, 2-1, but Besiktas lost even worse (6-0).

The Portuguese side's lone goal was scored by Mexican international striker Raul Jimenez, who showcased just about the best-case scenario for the high press with his tackle and goal.

Watch Lee Trundle's Outrageous Penalty Routine Bamboozle The Keeper

Swansea legend Lee Trundle appeared in a charity match for a team of Swansea all-stars on Sunday night, and the 40-year-old, who serves as a club ambassador for the team, scored with an outrageous penalty routine that Bob Bradley’s senior side would be unable of replicating.

Trundle pretended to be tying his boot lace, but somehow managed to get an extraordinary amount of power behind his cheeky toe poke. 

Un jugador en Chile marcó el gol más asombroso que hemos visto nunca

¿Qué puede hacer un sitio web de fútbol cuando se le acaba la hipérbole?

Quiero decir, esa es nuestra sangre vital aquí. Ningún gol puede ser simplemente "bueno". Tiene que "derretir tu cara" o "doblar el espacio-tiempo" o tal vez incluso " hacer que te orines encima".

 

Así es como se describen los goles en estos días, pero, amigos, no tenemos ninguna hipérbole para este. Y es todo cierto. Eso es todo.

Este es el mayor gol que hemos visto nunca.

Zlatan Does Zlatan Things, Fellaini Does Fellaini Things In Manchester United Draw

The clash between Manchester United and Everton played out much like a GEICO commercial this Saturday at Goodison Park.

The script goes something like this:

"If you're Zlatan, you score ridiculous goals and get away with almost anything, including stomping on Séamus Coleman's head. It's what you do."

"If you're Marouane Fellaini, you come off the bench at 85' and get called for a stupid penalty at the 87'. It's what you do."

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