Game Recaps

Paul Pogba Must Be Protected Like The Great Barrier Reef

There was a strange moment in the EFL Cup fourth round match between Manchester United and Manchester City during the half-time break. The first half had passed largely without incident save for a Kelechi Iheanacho header that the young Nigerian got completely wrong. Zlatan Ibrahimovic had a wretched opening 45 minutes, but the half-time punditry, as it so often does this season, gradually shifted to Paul Pogba. 

During the commercial intermission, we were treated to this beautiful Adidas commercial concerning the world’s most expensive player: 

Queretaro Are Into The Copa MX Final After Penalty Shootout

Queretaro vs. Toluca in the Copa MX semis was a classic goalkeepers' duel, which is a roundabout way of saying it was a 0-0 draw.

So hats off to Alfredo Talavera (Toluca) and Tiago Volpi (Queretaro), and no one else.

Both players earned clean sheets, saved penalties and even both scored penalties in the shootout. In the end, Volpi made one more save than Talavera, and so Queretaro advanced to the final (8-7), where they'll play the winner of tonight's Superclasico.

Bobby Wood And Fabian Johnson Light Up The German Cup Second Round

Bobby Wood scored a brace for Hamburg SV and Fabian Johnson scored the goal of the day for Borussia Monchengladbach as the USMNT members helped their respective sides to the round of 16 in the DFB-Pokal.

Johnson’s Gladbach took on German second division side VfB Stuttgart, and the American winger got the home side off to a dream start in front of 40,452 at Borussia-Park. Collecting the ball off an exquisite back heel pass from Andre Hahn, Johnson scored his second goal in all competitions for the club.

MIguel Layun Rocket Paves The Way For Porto Win Against Brugge

Porto and Mexico National Team player Miguel Layun is a fullback and occasional defensive midfielder by trade, which is weird because he can do things like this:

Chicharito’s Apparent Tap-In Is Miraculously Saved By Hugo Lloris

Tottenham Hotspur held Bayern Leverkusen 0-0 in Tuesday night's Champions League encounter in Germany on the back of some ridiculous heroics from Hugo Lloris in net. 

The first half saw Hotspur attempt to take the game to Leverkusen, but the German club defended resolutely. Vincent Janssen hit the post for the visitors and Christian Eriksen's follow-up attempt brought a great save out of Bernd Leno.

Lionel Messi Returns From Injury And Scores Three Minutes After Coming On

After over three weeks on the sidelines due to a groin injury, Lionel Messi made a triumphant return to football by scoring Barcelona’s fourth in their 4-0 victory over Deportivo La Coruna. The assist was fantastically provided by Neymar and the finish from Messi was emphatic.

It must’ve been an excruciating break from playing for Messi, watching Barcelona lose to Celta Vigo and then Argentina flounder in World Cup qualifying.

Marco Fabian Scores, Helps Eintracht Earn Stunning Point Off Bayern Munich

Marco Fabian’s Bundesliga season went from good to great on Saturday after notching a goal and playing brilliantly throughout the match against Bayern Munich.

The Mexican international was unfortunate not to have two goals on the day after seeing one of his shots strike the inside of the post. However, his 78th minute equalizer earned Eintracht Frankfurt an unlikely point against Bayern Munich.

Bolivia’s Pablo Escobar Nets A Screamer Off The Most Underrated Ass-ist Ever

Bolivia got off to an absolute flyer against Ecuador on Tuesday in La Paz. This shouldn’t surprise anyone as Bolivia’s home gournd, Estadio Hernando Siles at an altitude of 11,932 feet above sea level, is almost a literal deathtrap for CONMEBOL opposition.

La Verde took a fourth minute lead through Pablo Escobar, the 38-year-old attacking midfielder just thrashing a shot from almost 25 yards out. The shot was sensational, flying into the top corner. However, Rodrigo Ramallo also deserves credit for applying the assist from his a**. 

Colombia vs. Uruguay Was A Good Old-Fashioned Mudder And We Could Not Be Happier

We love a good mudder.

Colombia and Uruguay drew 2-2 Tuesday in what could only be called a mudder, a World Cup qualifier played in a driving rainstorm in which no player's jersey emerged clean. It was glorious.

Watch these highlights and then meet us on the other side. We're going to talk about mudders some more.

Giovani Dos Santos And Oribe Peralta Combine To Lead Mexico To Victory

Mexico’s final tune-up before their World Cup qualifying clash with the USA on November 11th ended in a 1-0 victory over Panama.

For spectators at Toyota Park in Illinois, it was a relatively uneventful night with a largely experimental Mexico side grafting out a victory.

The highlight of the beginning proceedings was probably a mariachi version of “The Star-Spangled Banner”.

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