France

Radamel Falcao used to be the most feared striker in the world. That's not an exaggeration. At the height of his powers, he was feared more than Suarez, more than Lewandowski and more than Benzema.

In his last season at Atletico Madrid, the Colombian scored 28 goals in 34 appearances. In fact, he ranked right behind Messi and Ronaldo as one of the best players on the planet.

Just check out Falcao's stats below.

Radamel Falcao's stats:

Mario Balotelli has threatened to do the unthinkable if his new team, Nice, win France's Ligue 1: fly a helicopter over the city.

Nice are first in the French league right now, due in part to Balotelli's return to goal-scoring form. Balotelli isn't just content with scoring goals and winning, though. He wants to plunge the world into chaos.

Here's the quote, from Mediaset (bolding ours):

Surprise! He's alive. What a year it's been for Mathieu Valbuena. After battling injuries and scandals, he was left off the France squad due to injury, and, of course, fans theorized that he must be dead.

Almost immediately following his removal from the squad, images of a fake death certificate began circulating twitter, and fans began spreading the rumor that the French midfielder had passed away, forcing his club to address the rumor on Twitter:

Paul pogba is one of those players who can change a match with one kick, seemingly out of nowhere. Here's proof:

That was too much boom for Stekelenburg to handle. #Pogboom #WCQ https://t.co/5uMFtoYabo

— FOX Soccer (@FOXSoccer) October 10, 2016

We know it as “The Beautiful Game”; We acclaim the footballing artists who offer us an escape from our mundane lives and jobs. With their magical skills, they dazzle and leave audiences of millions in awe.

Of the many beautiful aspects of the game, the dribble might just be the most singular of traits — one that only the truly gifted possess. People of yesteryear worshiped the likes of Maradona and Garrincha for what they could do with the ball. 

In today’s match with Lorient, Balotelli broke the tie with a late goal to put OGC Nice up 2-1. While this may come as a surprise to some, this goal is simply a continuation of Balotelli’s stellar form to start the season.

Through eight games played, thanks to Mario Balotelli’s contributions, the French side has found themselves atop the table, ahead of both high spending clubs, PSG and Monaco.

All aboard the Mario Balotelli redemption tour 2016 bandwagon. Don't be shy, there's plenty of room.

Balotelli scored again Thursday in Nice's Europa League loss to Krasnodar, giving the Italian five goals in four matches so far this season.

That's FIVE goals in four games now for Mario Balotelli... pic.twitter.com/TBPrmHiubX

— Sportlobster (@sportlobster) September 30, 2016

PSG right back Serge Aurier has been sentenced to two months in prison, reportedly for abusing police officers outside a Paris nightclub in May.

It's unlikely, though, that Aurier will serve any of that time.

From Eurosport: 

Marco Verratti is a rebel. He is set in his ways and completely conscious of his defiance toward the mainstream.

Verratti is currently the midfield lynchpin for one of Europe’s two most prominent oil-rich clubs — clubs known for annual collections of world class talent. His side, Paris Saint Germain, is the archetype of the modern European giant: a base of nationals mixed with a diverse group of foreign superstars. Verratti, an Italian, represents the foreign contingent at PSG. 

We were hoping for a successful Mario Balotelli tenure at Nice. Soccer is much more fun when Balotelli is good and scoring goals and not training with the reserves in Liverpool.

So, consider this us running a (very premature) victory lap, because Balotelli is killing it in France. He has played two games. He has scored four goals. Here is his most recent brace:

Mario Balotelli Scores !!! Makes it 2-0 For Nice against Monaco!! pic.twitter.com/X4SlxvJQFo