China

Hulk Only Scores Wonder Goals, But This Is His Best Yet

Hulk and Shanghai SIPG took on bottom-of-the-table Yanbian Fude in the Chinese Super League today, and you can probably guess what happened. There’s really nothing more routine in the world of football right now than the monthly wonder goal from Hulk in Asia, it’s like clockwork.

Well, here’s your banger for the month of July from the Brazilian billionaire. 

Europe Doesn't Need To Fear The CSL, But The NHL Does

In recent years, the top division in China has slowly become a new locus of appealing, high-octane soccer. Some of this has to do with the big name stars the league has drawn in like Carlos Tevez, Alexandre Pato, Ricardo Carvahlo and a host of others. 

However, in the past couple weeks, it seems a different pattern is getting all the attention — the bizarre displays of violence and aggression that have unfolded on the field. 

Parma Is The Latest European Club To Be Bought By A Chinese Investor

Two-time Europa League winner Parma Calcio 1913 sold to Jiang Lizhang on Wednesday, adding to the growing trend of Chinese businessmen buying European socer clubs.

The following first and second division teams in Europe are now all principally owned by Chinese investors.

Club

German League Adding A Team From China

China has a lot of people. And a lot of money.

Germany has a lot of soccer teams. And a lot of team owners who want more money.

It's a match made in heaven.

A league in Germany's fourth tier found a novel way to add a squad for a nice, even, 20-team table — they're bringing in a team from China.

Your Complete Guide To The 2017 Summer Soccer Schedule

Here it is: your complete guide to the 2017 summer soccer schedule. 

For most sports, the offseason is a time of respite. Once the Super Bowl ends in February, NFL teams don’t suit up for another game, scrimmage or otherwise, for six months. Soccer, fortunately, doesn’t abide by such silly rules.

The European soccer season technically ends after the Champions League final around late May or early June, but preseason exhibitions pick up in early July. Then there are also international matches (friendlies and cups) to also fill the void. 

Oscar Uses Pinpoint Accuracy To Pelt Two Players, Smartly Plays Dead In Ensuing Brawl

How’s Oscar doing with Shanghai SIPG in the Chinese Super League? Pretty good. For one, he’ll pocket $26 million this season. But how’s the season going? Shanghai are in second after 13 matches, with Oscar scoring one goal and dropping seven assists for the Red Eagles. 

On Saturday, Shanghai played Guangzhou R&F (the R&F stands for “Rich” and “Force”, nice). SIPG manager Don Juan Andre Villas-Boas watched as Oscar slipped in Hulk for a Shanghai equalizer in the 45th minute, but then things decidedly went to s**t.

This Chinese Club Announced Their New Manager With A Poem

Sven-Goran Eriksson has been sacked as manager of Chinese second division club Shenzhen and has been replaced with Wang Baoshan. We know this because Shenzhen posted a poem on their website welcoming Wang as their new coach.

We are not making this up:

Eleven years ago, you led Shenzhen football and never let us down.

Nine years ago, you took over responsibilities and saved Shenzhen football.

Memories of fighting together have never gone away, and now we recall the legend.

It’s Doubtful Mateo Messi Will Be Old Enough Or Tall Enough To Enjoy The Messi Experience Park

Lionel Messi has recently unveiled his plans to personally and painstakingly design, build and operate his own theme park in Nanjing, China. It will be called the Messi Experience Park (MEP), which is infinitely lamer than Messi World, Magic Messi Kingdom or Messi's Wonderous Adventureland. With over 20 attractions on a sprawling 42,000 square meter space, the biggest question remains whether or not Mateo Messi will be old enough or tall enough to have any fun.

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