Why do we watch pre-season friendlies? Llverpool have played an estimated 985 friendlies so far this pre-season, and I haven't learned anything. I don't know any more about the team. I haven't the slightest idea how they'll line up in games that matter, nor do I have any idea how certain players will perform in games that really matter.
Not that this lack of knowledge stops me from participating in wild speculation on any of these topics. Can James Milner replace Alberto Moreno at left back? Will Ovie Ejaria live up to the wild expectations we now all have for him based on this pre-season? Who will start at striker? Center mid? I don't know! And neither do you.
So, I ask again, why do we watch these wretched games?
Nothing good can come of this, and we know that already, yet we still subject ourselves to watching sort-of in shape players screwing around for 90 minutes and then we come to sweeping conclusions based on what we saw. This is objectively insane, and I know this, but I'm guilty of it too.
I watched Liverpool face Roma on Monday, and the Reds lost. I was horrified. They played poorly against the Italian side, looking scared and confused at the back and unsure in possession. My thoughts after the game: "Klopp needs to make some changes, like, right now if he wants to get anything out of this group. I don't know what kind of changes, but something. Daniel Sturridge still hasn't scored this pre-season, so it might be time to look elsewhere for a striker, and we clearly need a defensive mid and some fullback cover."
Translation: I am an insane person and should not be allowed in rooms with sharp objects and/or Liverpool friendlies on TV. And so are you.
Contact The18 Staff Writer Sam Klomhaus at Klomhaus@The18.com or follow him on Twitter @SamKlomhaus