There’s no fighting the feeling that the Champions League group stage has become more and more of a nonevent over the past few years. Over the course of this week’s action, we watched Chelsea hammer Qarabag 6-0, PSG pummel Celtic 5-0 and Manchester City put four unanswered past Feyenoord. Even the marquee matchup between Barcelona and Juventus had the feeling of an International Champions Cup match being played at Camping World Stadium in Orlando.
Contrary to what Sony, Heineken, MasterCard and Nissan would have us believe, this wasn’t a smorgasbord of can’t-miss footballing drama, this was all a giant apathy neatly summed up by Real Madrid versus APOEL Nicosia — this was the Bernabeu welcoming their back-to-back champions at less than 90% capacity and roaring their squad on with tongue firmly planted in cheek.
But it’s the Champions League!
Madridistas couldn't help it. They, like the rest of us, knew it was perhaps the greatest club side ever assembled (with a squad value approaching $900 million) vs. the champions of Cyprus (with a squad value of about $22 million). It was a grand cosmic joke.
And so there was something absurdly tragic about Cristiano Ronaldo ripping off nine shots after being fed time and time again inside the opponent’s box. There was something pathetic about the four-time Ballon d’Or winner inviting the adulation of the crowd after converting a bogus penalty to effectively end the match at 2-0 with only 50 minutes gone.
The same could be said about Sergio Ramos getting forward, slapping in an ugly overhead kick and sliding across the pitch like he’d just put Spain on the cusp of World Cup glory.
Good grief. Photo: @ChampionsLeague | Twitter
To be clear, it wasn't the fault of Ramos or Ronaldo. This was the hand they’d been dealt. This was modern football encapsulated.
But this empty feeling was acknowledged by all within the Spanish capital who weren't exactly captivated by APOEL's ability to only lose by three goals, and it manifested itself in scorn and derision, aimed chiefly at the sort of player that stands out most in this sort of situation: Gareth Bale.
A Galactico in cost, stature and presence, Bale had no right to be traumatizing APOEL’s right side. Even Bale seemed acutely aware of the mismatch, forgoing dribbling and shooting from close range and instead electing to send a myriad of dangerous balls in from the wing.
Over on FS2, Real Madrid lead 1-0!
Guess who scored? Oh yeah, that one guy Cristiano Ronaldo. #UCL https://t.co/nwkbPJO0Ho— FOX Soccer (@FOXSoccer) September 13, 2017
In the end, Bale provided five key passes while commanding any aerial ball played his way. He was nonchalantly unstoppable, like most Real players on the pitch.
And so the jeers and whistles rained down from those in attendance. He was pulled in the 82nd minute for Borja Mayoral, a 20-year-old striker who’d come through the youth ranks at Real. This was exactly the kind of match for a player like Mayoral, not the Welsh captain, and Madrid fans recognized that. They let Bale hear it.
“It is, of course, not a good thing to whistle against your own players. We gave our all, and Gareth also, and no-one deserved it,” said Toni Kroos after the match. “This is Real Madrid and everybody wants to see the best of each player, but there are games where it is impossible to play at the best level. But one thing is clear — it does not help anyone.”
Manager Zinedine Zidane and midfielder Casemiro also leapt to Bale’s defense, but there’s really no remedy for the current Bale malaise in Madrid. It’s just boredom. There’s a clear lack of narrative that’ll remain unresolved until later in the season.
In a way Real are extremely fortunate to have been grouped alongside Tottenham and Borussia Dortmund, giving them a few matches to actually get excited about. As their early La Liga results show, there’s an irritable hangover that the club and its supporters need to kick.
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