This Is Noukie: The Footballer So Easy To Love We’ve Forgotten How To Like

When I was told to write a profile of Dutch footballer Anouk Hoogendijk, a defender for Ajax’s women's team, that emphasized why people would like her, I thought: impossible.

She doesn’t know her place. She has won the Dutch women’s league twice with Saestum, the Dutch cup once with FC Utrecht, and the FA cup once with the Arsenal Ladies.

Photo: @anoukhoogendijk | Instagram

She has a great personality, something that is far too apparent on her website and Instagram.

Photo: @anoukhoogendijk | Instagram

Her nickname is “Noukie,” which is literally too adorable. PAINFULLY ADORABLE.

Photo: @anoukhoogendijk | Instagram

I was helpless. How, I declared incredulously, how could someone like her: a consummate professional, who has played for FC Utrecht, Arsenal Ladies, FC Ajax, and earned over 100 caps for the Dutch national team?

Photo: @anoukhoogendijk | Instagram

Who has a f***ing squad like this:

Photo: @anoukhoogendijk | Instagram

And appreciates the funny things in life (that jacket tho):

Last week I stayed in a hotel with my mother. We booked a room with jacuzzi. So this is a jacuzzi? #jacuzziDutchStyle #familytime #fun

A photo posted by Anouk Hoogendijk (@anoukhoogendijk) on Jun 15, 2016 at 1:29am PDT

Who is delightfully classy, and yet unrefined.

Photo: @anoukhoogendijk | Instagram

Who isn’t about all that vegan bulls***.

De koe is binnen #koopeenkoepuntnl #thanksteamies #topcadeau #genoegvleesinhuis

A photo posted by Anouk Hoogendijk (@anoukhoogendijk) on Jan 9, 2016 at 7:38am PST

And who has excellent taste.

Photo: @anoukhoogendijk | Instagram

It’s just not possible. I mean, she even likes paddle boarding. Who doesn’t f***ing love paddle boarding. 

Photo: @anoukhoogendijk | Instagram

She’ll probably push you real hard during workouts, too. After all, she is a brand ambassador to Nike and her parents were Physical Education teachers.

Photo: @anoukhoogendijk | Instagram

It’s all unbelievable. Don’t tell me, she’s probably terrible with kids.

A video posted by Anouk Hoogendijk (@anoukhoogendijk) on Jan 17, 2016 at 5:27am PST

And hates Halloween.

Photo: @anoukhoogendijk | Instagram

We here at The18 even made a propaganda video about her. We told Giorgio, our video guy, to just let her personality shine through, because that would be enough to make anyone realize how impossible liking her is:

She even has the gall to score beautiful goals. As if she didn’t have enough already.

Photo: @anoukhoogendijk | Instagram

Ugh, like her? Impossible. I love her.

Follow me on Twitter: @yetly