Zlatan Ibrahimovic

How To Build A Better Zlatan Robot

Stockholm

(At The ZlatanBot Factory)

Scientist: sir, the unit has broken down. A failure of the knee joint, apparently

Boss guy: Goddammit the warranty just expired

Other scientist: well, at least this will give us a chance to improve the unit

Zlatan: I am right here, and I can hear you. I am Zlatan, and I am already as close to perfect as can possibly exist

Scientist: well at least the hearing module still works

Other scientist: and the confidence module

Zlatan: Everything works I am Zlatan

Zlatan Is In The U.S. To Meet With A Renowned Orthopedic Surgeon

Less than a week after suffering a torn ACL and possible damage to his PCL, Zlatan Ibrahimovic is scheduled to visit Dr. Freddie Fu at the University of Pittsburgh Medical Center. Dr. Fu is well known for pioneering the double bundle technique to repair ACL tears, the method that most effectively restores natural knee movement patterns.

Zlatan Says He Will Come back Stronger From His Knee Injury

Zlatan is injured. We didn't know Zlatan could get injured. We thought he was impervious to harm. We thought he was immortal. We were wrong. Zlatan is injured.

Zlatan is injured so badly it's feared his career could be over. One person, at least, doesn't think Zlatan is anywhere near the finish line. That person is Zlatan.

Zlatan Ibrahimovic’s Professional Career Could Be Over

“I don’t know how long I have left,” Zlatan Ibrahimovic told BT Sport prior to Manchester United’s second leg match against Anderlecht. “Rashford, Lingard have long careers in front of them. I was there 15 years ago, I don’t know how long I have left.” If the latest reports are confirmed, Zlatan Ibrahimovic has suffered a devastating knee injury that could spell the end of the 35-year-old’s career.

Spare A Thought For Those Whose Lifelong Dream Of Visiting Old Trafford Came True This Season

According to Manchester United, the club boasts 659 million followers worldwide. Of that number, 109,000 international visitors make the journey to Old Trafford every year to see their beloved Red Devils play according to the Office for National Statistics.

Zlatan Met The Former King Of Spain

Zlatan Ibrahimovic is mostlyknown for two things: thinking very highly of himself, and doing things on a soccer field that cause other people to think very highly of him.

The first trait was on display when Zlatan met Juan Carlos I, the 79-year-old former King of Spain.

What Would Manchester United Be Without Zlatan Ibrahimovic?

It could be argued that this was Jose Mourinho’s masterplan all along against Rostov at Old Trafford, to sit back, control possession against an ultra-defensive setup and just let Zlatan Ibrahimovic do his thing.

It worked, and no one will remember this game tomorrow. Manchester United are through to the quarterfinals of the Europa League thanks to a beautiful assist from Ibrahimovic. United required a phenomenal save from Sergio Romero at the death to avoid extra time, and everything else made you want to be crushed by the skull of Marouane Fellaini. 

Marouane Fellaini’s Chest Defrosts An Otherwise Frozen Affair In Rostov-on-Don

The Олимп-2 pitch in Rostov-on-Don was frozen. It was wonderfully patchy and Jose Mourinho wondered if you could even call it a field at all. His desire to have the venue changed was laughed off by a UEFA official, Mourinho claiming the official told him “the players are insured, so if something happens, no problem.”

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