Humor

Teenager scores winner for Man Utd, gets permission from Ronaldo to do his celly

When Alejandro Garnacho was born in Madrid in 2004, he'd already missed Cristiano Ronaldo's first season with Manchester United and his legendary performance in the FA Cup final as a 19-year-old.

However, Ronaldo would transfer to Real Madrid five years later and Garnacho — who spent his youth career in Madrid with Getafe and then Atlético — was in the city for all nine illustrious seasons of CR7 at the Santiago Bernabéu.

Guy messes up shot so bad it goes full Roberto Carlos and becomes Puskás contender

Every weekend in global football ushers forth a new 30-yard screamer, mesmerizing solo dribble or acrobatic display of technical ability to feast on, but it's a rare thing indeed to see an effort of such bend and swerve that it makes Roberto Carlos weep gentle tears upon his tree trunk legs.

Bend it like Beckham? David Beckham never took a shot near the halfway line that looked destined for a throw-in on the near touchline before violently changing course and swazzing inside the far post. No, bend it like this guy on Kvk Avelgem in Belgium's fourth provisional division. 

Manager immediately shifts focus to getting wife in 'sexy mood' after big win

Hartlepool United manager Keith Curle led his side to a 2-1 victory over Grimsby Town on Saturday to climb off the bottom of the League Two table, and the 58-year-old wasn't bashful when discussing his feelings during the post-match interview.

Antony's trademark skill is so entirely useless that it's the best in the game

The moment we've been waiting for finally arrived Thursday during Manchester United's Europa League match against Sheriff. With the score level at 0-0 and his marker smartly giving him room, the trademark Antony spin skill — followed directly by an overweighted pass — was unleashed.

The sequence has gotten a lot of hate (the British absolutely despise this sort of thing) but that's because the internet is a foul place where joy and individual expression go to die.

Five outrageous playoff formats MLS should consider using

The MLS Cup Playoffs have never been set in stone. In the league’s 27 seasons, no fewer than four playoff formats have been used to varying degrees of success. The current system, which features a single elimination format with seven teams from each conference, is easy to understand and follow but could definitely use some improvement, at least according to MLS. 

Thierry Henry blasts a free kick into Micah Richards' face during CBS UCL coverage

The two early matches of Wednesday's UEFA Champions League action delivered plenty of drama with Inter Milan beating Viktoria Plzeň 4-0 to condemn Barcelona to the Europa League and Porto beating Club Brugge to put Atlético in a similar position, but the highlight of CBS Sports' coverage was from its ongoing "Destination Brooklyn" viewing party.

Guardiola warns Haaland not to overdo it on the tasty treats during World Cup break

Manchester City manager Pep Guardiola joked he wanted striker Erling Haaland to lay off the food and drink during the mid-season break for the World Cup and come back fit to spearhead the club's hunt for trophies in the second half of the season.

Norway's Haaland, who has scored 22 goals in 15 games across all competitions so far, will not be heading to Qatar for the Nov. 20-Dec. 18 tournament after his country failed to qualify.

Jack Grealish unintentionally manifested Miguel Almirón’s prime into existence

Miguel Almirón has had himself a proper start to the 2022-23 Premier League season.

The Paraguayan has scored six goals in 12 games with five in his last five appearances — his best goalscoring season since arriving at Newcastle United in 2019.

The Qatar World Cup's 'first fan' arrived 6 months ago and has been 'having a blast' ever since

BUENOS AIRES - Argentina's self-styled "first fan" Marcelo Martinez is so keen to see Lionel Messi and teammates at the World Cup that he arrived in Qatar six months early.

The first traveling Argentinian fan — and possibly the first visiting fan full stop — flew into Doha on May 3 with his blue-and-white wig, and has been having a blast ever since.

"Wonderful things have been happening," said the 54-year-old lawyer, who has found plenty of Qataris and expatriates sporting Argentina shirts. "They all love Messi and Argentina here."

La maldición del ¡SIUU!: Camilo Sanvezzo es la nueva víctima del festejo a lo Cristiano Ronaldo

En vista de los últimos acontecimientos, los clubes de la Liga MX deberían prohibir a sus jugadores celebrar goles con el icónico ¡SIUU! de Cristiano Ronaldo. Esto luego de que en menos de una semana, dos jugadores que lo intentaron vieron como sus dianas era anuladas segundos después.

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