The greatest footballing nation to have never won the World Cup? It’s the Netherlands. The Oranje have thrice reached the final, losing to hosts West Germany in ’74, hosts Argentina in ’78 and Spain in 2010. The most famous of those defeats came against the Germans, because this was a tournament that had been turned into a pageant for the Dutch vision of Total Football.
One year ago, Barcelona came into the second leg of the Champions League round of 16 down 4-0 on aggregate to PSG. They left with a 6-5 aggregate scoreline after one of the silliest soccer games this professional soccer writer has ever seen. Sergi Roberto's goal broke PSG hearts and shuffled Barca into the quarterfinals to be beaten by eventual runners-up Juventus.
The real heroes here, though, are the referees. I seriously forgot how terrible both penalties Barcelona "won" were. Neither of those are fouls in a just universe.
Cristiano Ronaldo Jr. ya parece mejor jugador que su querido padre. Esta impresionante patada de bicicleta es una prueba.
El hijo de Ronaldo estaba jugando en el campo del Bernabéu con el hijo de Marcelo cuando el centrocampista del Real Madrid Lucas Vázquez lanzó un balón al área para los dos muchachos. Ronaldo Jr. midió su salto y lanzó su bota hacia el balón para un gol de patada de bicicleta perfectamente ejecutado.
TAMBIÉN TE PUEDE GUSTAR: Kid Soccer Fails
Jonathan Osorio had one of the worst misses you can imagine. He atoned for it with one of the sweetest finishes imaginable to lead Toronto FC to a 2-1 comeback win over Tigres UANL on Wednesday in Toronto. The second leg of Tigres vs. Toronto in the CONCACAF Champions League quarterfinals will be Tuesday back in Mexico.
Tigres took a lead in the 52nd minute through Eduardo Vargas but the Reds nearly responded immediately, only for Osorio to sky his wide-open shot from six yards out. It was a shocking miss and one that could haunt a player for the rest of the match.
You are supposed to kick the ball out of bounds when an opponent gets legitimately hurt during a soccer match so the medical staff can tend to the injured person. You are not supposed to take the ball from the injured person and try to score a goal. That is considered bad sportsmanship.
And yet, that's what Arsenal Tula did in extra time against Terek Grozny in the Russian Premier League. The did not do good sportsmanship. They did bad sportsmanship. They also won the game, because there are no truly black and white decisions in this crazy mixed-up universe of ours.
France entered the SheBelieves Cup as the lowest-ranked team of the four involved, ranked sixth while the others were all in the top three. But thanks to a blistering goal from Amandine Henry for France vs. Germany, Les Bleues ensured they didn’t finish last in the tournament, beating Die Nationalelf 3-0.
Tottenham had this. For 60 minutes of play, Tottenham deserved this ... but Juventus aren’t here for your sentimental nonsense.
Spurs landed five shots on target in the first half — nobody does that to Juventus. Son Heung-min looked razor sharp. Harry Kane was bossing Giorgio Chiellini. Paulo Dybala was about to get roasted on the spit of a thousand different hot takes. Only Andrea Barzagli was doing fun, wily veteran things.
Was this a red card for Barzagli?
RT for Red Card
The New York Red Bulls took a giant step towards the CONCACAF Champions League semifinals with a rare MLS victory in Mexico on Tuesday night, downing Club Tijuana at Estadio Caliente 2-0 in their quarterfinal first leg matchup.
The Metros will need to take care of business at Red Bull Arena on March 13, but they played the first leg to perfection. Bradley Wright-Phillips, the club’s all-time leading scorer, scored a brace and USMNT goalkeeper Luis Robles recorded 13 saves, and the MLS side now returns to Harrison with two vital away goals and a precious clean sheet.
Hey, this all turned out well for American soccer. Thanks to FC Dallas’ shitshow performance against Tauro FC, the MLS side got to avoid getting spanked by Club America in the CONCACAF Champions League quarterfinals, and look who’s now doing the spanking — it’s Angeleno Joe Corona!
Paris Saint-Germain was always going to be facing an uphill battle. After allowing three unanswered goals in a 3-1 defeat to Real Madrid at the Bernabeu, a comeback became even more unlikely when Neymar injured himself right before his sister’s birthday. But the Brazilian really missed by PSG vs Real Madrid in the Champions League was not Neymar but experienced defender Dani Alves.