Goals

The result wasn’t what Clint Dempsey and the defending MLS Cup champions wanted, a 2-1 defeat to Houston Dynamo to start their 2017 season, but the USMNT player and his club will be delighted that he was able to play 90 minutes and score a goal after six months out with an irregular heartbeat.

Dempsey was sidelined last August after the issue was diagnosed, making him a spectator for Seattle’s improbable MLS Cup triumph, but he was cleared to return to play this preseason. Dempsey picked up right where he left off for Seattle, scoring their lone goal in a 2-1 defeat to Houston.

Eryk Williamson, a sophomore at the University of Maryland and a potential DC United Homegrown player, smashed a half-volley from almost 25 yards out that crashed in off the inside of the left post to send the United States U-20 team to the final of the 2017 CONCACAF Championship. The victory also clinched the American's spot at the FIFA U-20 World Cup.

17-year-old Uruguayan striker Owen Falconis has showcased the talent to be the next in a long line of Uruguayan attacking legends. Once he gets those braces off and people stop calling him braceface, the sky is the limit.

In recent times, Diego Forlan, Edinson Cavani and Luis Suarez have all come to symbolize Uruguay’s attacking threat, and Falconis has made his own mark at the 2017 South American U-17 Championship in Chile with this goal from the half-way line.

Thanks to animator Weevil888, we get to relive Olivier Giroud’s fantastic scorpion kick goal against Crystal Palace in quality that makes Planet Earth II’s Ultra-high-definition look like garbage. Because now, for the first time ever, it’s been recreated in glorious Lego form. 

Olivier Giroud is as dashing a Lego person as you’ll ever see, Alexis Sanchez has got his blue gloves on and some Gunners supporters want “Wenger In” and some want “Wenger Out”. 

Here’s a quick update for you: Hulk, the €55.8 million man, is still ripping shots in Asia for Shanghai SIPG. This latest goal came against FC Seoul in the Asian Champions League. 

Hulk is very much like his superhero namesake in that he’s very strong and really only exists in edited movie clips following his move to Zenit Saint Petersburg in 2012. 

In my mind, he does absolutely nothing other than pulverize the net from 25-30 yards out. Until next time, Mr. Hulk.