Peter Crouch has got jokes. This has already been established, but Crouch re-established it after the Champions League draw Thursday when he saw Tottenham, his former club, had once again been drawn with Real Madrid.
Real Madrid for spurs . If they don't have an idiot sent off early they have a great chance
— Peter Crouch (@petercrouch) August 24, 2017
Can you hear it? Playing over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over again? It’s the Champions League anthem. The best thing to happen to Tuesdays and Wednesdays since Frasier went off air is nearly back.
Thursday marked the Champions League group stage draw in Monaco but we know you only care about two things, so let’s get them out of the way.
Qarabag was drawn into Group C and Christian Pulisic is in Group H, with two more matches against Real Madrid in store, not to mention a date at Wembley.
With Liverpool’s 6-3 aggregate pasting of Hoffenheim on Wednesday, the English Premier League put five clubs in the Champions League for the first time. That’s five chances for English fans to cry over their clubs failing to come through in the continental competition.
Chelsea won the Champions League in 2012 but since then English clubs have barely sniffed the final. In 2015, no EPL team even made it past the Round of 16. The days of 2008 — when the EPL had three of the four semifinalists, including both teams in the final — are barely visible in the rearview mirror.
Everyone loves a good hero. Jasmin Handanović was that hero on Tuesday night for NK Maribor in a Champions League playoff against Hapoel Be’er.
Holding on to a slender aggregate lead on away goals in the 90th minute, the Maribor goalkeeper came up with an incredible sprawling save to keep his team ahead.
The Champions League group stage will begin next month. Until then, we must make do with the exploits of lesser-known clubs like Hapoel Be'er Sheva and Liverpool.
The former produced what is sure to be one of the goals of the season, a sweet volley from Anthony Nwakaeme.
We have an early candidate for goal of the season!
Nothing like a good Twitter trolling to spice up a Champions League match. İstanbul Başakşehir hosts Sevilla in a Champions League qualifying playoff first leg on Wednesday.
The Turkish club sent a friendly message to the Spanish club, suggesting they’d be much happier winning another Europa League, the tournament into which the loser of the home-and-home series will fall.
Warning: This video is heartbreaking for everyone but CSKA Moscow fans. In the 91st minute of a scoreless Champions League playoff first leg between CSKA and Swiss club Young Boys, defender Kasim Adams Nuhu attempted to head the ball back to his keeper. Only his keeper was already coming out to receive the ball.
You can guess what happened next.
Is this the worst way to lose a game in stoppage time you've ever seen?
A wonderfully invented goal from Isco and a successful foray forward from Casemiro were enough to overcome Romelu Lukaku’s first competitive Manchester United goal on Tuesday, and Real Madrid captured an early piece of silverware in their 2017-18 campaign by defeating Manchester United in the UEFA Super Cup.
Last June, Real became the first club to successfully defend their European title in the Champions League era, and based off the evidence here, they have to be firm UCL favorites this season as well.