The moment Boca Juniors forward Carlos Tevez made the challenge on Ezequeil Ham of the Argentinos Juniors on Saturday night, he likely knew something had gone terribly wrong.
"I went for the ball, I didn't have bad intentions," Tevez said in a televised interview after the game. "I'm sad because I didn't want to hurt the lad, I've never hurt anyone playing football, this is the first time."
So Viktoria Plzeň's David Limbersky is a class A idiot, and he absolutely does not give a single f***. We’re about to find out how that last part is going for him real soon. Limbersky is apparently attempting to see how much he can try the patience of the Prague Police Department, or at least that’s what it seems like.
This…is unfortunate. I am absolutely sure that during the 5 minutes immediately after the following ordeal, defender Helen Eke probably wanted to crawl into the nearest small dark space and stay there until the laws of physics and the slow crawl of inevitability transported her to the other side of the planet.
David Attenborough is perhaps best-known for his narration of the television series "Planet Earth" and for his nature show on the BBC.
What he is not known for is soccer commentary, but that's just what happened when someone (who we must say is a proper genius) put audio of David Attenborough's narration over a clip of Manchester United practicing.
The bit about Wayne Rooney in particular made our day better.
Ladies and gentlemen, from the people that brought you “David at the Dentist” comes the Champions League video you and all of your friends will be talking about for, you know, at least the next 72 hours. It comes from the world of Reddit, and just might make “AAAAYYYYYY” your go-to phrase for the forceable future.
The Premier League returned from its first international break with a vengeance: you had Anthony Martial becoming the reincarnation of Thierry Henry against Liverpool; Chelsea going full crisis; and, of course, West Ham providing some hot Monday Night Football action:
Manchester United's Luke Shaw has suffered a horrific leg break during Tuesday's Champions League match between Manchester United and PSV Eindhoven. PSV's Hector Moreno made the tackle.
The injury comes after a bright start to the season from Shaw, who impressed in a full-back role for the Red Devils.
In case you missed it, this kid juggled a soccer ball while solving a Rubik's Cube.
We are not here to talk about Rubik's Cubes, though. We are here to talk about the saxophone, specifically "Careless Whisper," by George Michael. This kid can apparently play "Careless Whisper" while juggling a soccer ball.
A rose ceremony is a thing in certain Americcan reality TV shows in which a hunky rich guy gives flowers to hot girls, save one, in order to narrow them down to one special hot girl whom he will eventually divorce and everyone will totally see it coming.
Steven Gerrard would like for you to stay in school, because you probably won't make it as a professional footballer.