South America

Neymar Left Bloodied After Taking Bolivia To The Cleaners One Too Many Times

Neymar’s match against Bolivia contained parts of the good, the bad and the ugly. The good was a goal and two assists which helped the Selecao to a 5—0 rout of Bolivia in Natal, Brazil. 

The bad was a 36th-minute yellow card that means he’s suspended for Brazil’s October 11th qualifier away to Venezuela. However, given that Venezuela currently dwell at the bottom of the CONMEBOL WCQ table with two points from nine matches, Neymar’s absence shouldn’t be a factor.

Enner Valencia Evades Police Capture While Being Carted Off Injured

CONMEBOL World Cup qualifying grew in legend with another improbable incident during Thursday’s match between Ecuador and Chile.

With Ecuador holding a 3-0 advantage over Chile at the Estadio Olimpico Atahualpa in Quito, Ecuardorian international Enner Valencia, who plays his club football for Everton in the Premier League, allegedly faked an injury to evade police capture in the 82nd minute.

Ronaldinho Will Play A Friendly With A Third-Tier Mexican Club

Ronaldinho is coming back, at least for one more game. The Brazilian attacking midfielder hasn't retired fro soccer yet, and he says he wants to play one more year. He claims to have offers in MLS and China, but before he goes to either of those places 'Dinho is going to make an appearance for Mexican third-division club Cinco Estrellas in a friendly against Monterrey in December.

He announced his apearance in a video on the Cinco Estrellas facebook page.

Neymar Is Going To Unleash His Music Upon Us Because It’s Time

Remember when Daft Punk released their magnum opus Random Access Memories in 2013, heralded with a genius marketing campaign combining new school strategy and old school nostalgia? By slowly teasing the album’s release, the electronic masters created a buzz that engulfed social media. 

It has been three years since those seminal moments in the music industry, but we appear to be on the verge of another musical zeitgeist. The sound of 2016 is going to be provided by none other than Neymar, his aptly titled #Neymusico already causing a Twitterstorm.

Don’t Worry, Neymar Will Do It

For the first time in about ten years, it must finally be relaxing to be a fan of the Brazilian national team. At the 2005 Confederations Cup, Brazil merrily captured the title with a squad containing the assurances of Kaka, Ronaldinho, Lucio and the phenomenal talents of Adriano and Robinho. That was the end of the fun.

Venezuela Keeper Saves Penalties From Carlos Bacca And James Rodriguez In The Same Game

Venezuelan goalkeeper Dani Hernandez stopped two penalties against Colombian stars Carlos Bacca and James Rodriguez in less than 15 minutes in a World Cup qualifier Thursday. Colombia beat Venezuela 2-0 in Barranquilla.

Hernandez, who plays for Tenerife in the Spanish second division, is the first goalkeeper to stop two penalties in a World Cup qualifier in CONMEBOL history, according to @OptaJavier.

Lionel Messi Returns For Argentina, Scores Winning Goal In 1-0 Victory Over Uruguay

It just had to be, didn’t it? Lionel Messi announced his return to the Argentina fold by scoring the game-winning goal for La Albiceleste against Uruguay, catapulting his country to the top of the CONMEBOL World Cup qualifying table in the process.

While Messi’s international retirement resulted in him missing zero action for Argentina, it was still an emotional return for the Barcelona man at the Estadio Malvinas Argentinas in Mendoza, Argentina.

Your Guide To The Uruguayan Primera Division

Sunday, the Uruguayan Primera Division finally started play. The league is currently changing the Uruguayan football season from the European format to a calendar year format.

After 11 seasons in the European format, in 2017 the league will be play from January to December.

The change has had several delays, first because cameras and increased security measures at stadiums were required, and then by storms that occurred Saturday, August 27.

The Uruguayan Primera Division will end on December 4. The 16 teams will play a round robin, totaling 15 games.

Diego Maradona Stopped By Argentina's Border Police For "Holding A Fake Passport"

Diego Maradona is revered in Argentina, except, apparently, by the border police.

The 55-year-old football legend was reportedly detained by border police at an airport while traveling to Dubai from Buenos Aires. The police supposedly accused Maradona of having a false or stolen passport.

Maradona responded as would be expected, by throwing out conspiracy theories.

“I won’t let anyone control my life,” he told Diario Popular.

Bolivia Name 93-Man Squad For World Cup Qualifiers. Seriously.

With Bolivia sitting ninth in the 10-team South American World Cup qualifying table, and having lost all three of their Copa America Centenario matches, newly appointed manager Angel Guillermo Hoyos is determined to get the most out of La Verde by going back to square one — the square where he determines who in Bolivia actually plays soccer.

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