Premier League

Mike Ashley Is The Owner You Didn't Know You Wanted In Your LIfe

Newcastle United owner Mike Ashley is your drunk uncle at Thanksgiving, but if your uncle was an extremely wealthy businessman and Thanksgiving was every day.

The Telegraph has reported one of the most amazing stories of the year, detailing Ashley's alleged business practice of getting everybody on his management team trashed and then making decisions.

Shot:

Following The Summer Transfer Window Is Like Reading A Young Teen Novel Every Day

The likes of Arsenal, Everton, Leicester City, Newcastle United and Tottenham all saw the majority of their players return to the training ground for the start of preseason today. Many other sides, like Manchester United, Liverpool and Chelsea, will also begin their preparations this week.

20-Year-Old Attacking Virtuoso Henry Onyekuru Opts For Everton Over Arsenal

Everton have made a lot of noise in this summer’s transfer market after signing Jordan Pickford from Sunderland for £30 million and Davy Klaasen from Ajax for £23.5, but their most exciting signing yet was confirmed today, although 20-year-old Nigerian international Henry Onyekuru won’t be appearing at Goodison Park for another year.

The Champions League Starts Up Again Tuesday

Suffering from Champions League withdrawal?

It’s been less than a month since Real Madrid thrashed Juventus to claim the crown of top club in Europe, but teams are about to begin the quest to take away that crown.

The first qualifying round for the world’s premier club competition (go away, FIFA Club World Cup, no one cares about you) begins Tuesday and Wednesday. 

Arsenal And Chelsea Will Donate Their Community Shield Money To Victims Of The Grenfell Tower Fire

Arsenal and Chelsea will meet in the Community Shield in August, and both clubs will donate their match fees to victims of the Grenfell Tower fire. The match is expected to raise about £1.25 million. Both clubs announced their actions in statements on their respective websites.

From Chelsea:

Peter Crouch Still Has All The Jokes

Peter Crouch, who famously responded "a virgin" when asked what he would be if he wasn't a footballer, is at it again. The 6'7" Stoke City striker remains one of the funniest fellows in football, and one of the most likeable. A little self-deprecating humor goes a long way. 

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