Game Recaps

Standing at 6’3’’ and built like brick s***houses, Christian Benteke and Romelu Lukaku both share a distinct ability to absolutely boss center-backs. Both are charged with doing as much for their club sides, Everton and Crystal Palace.

On Friday night, the two players went head to head in a match surely watched by Belgium manager Roberto Martinez and his assistant Thierry Henry. While the two strikers share some qualities, they’re incredibly different in their approach play.

Francesco Totti celebrated with 40th birthday on Tuesday, a milestone that encapsulates 25 seasons at one club, AS Roma. Totti has been as effective as ever for the Giallorossi, scoring two goals and registering two assists in just 192 minutes of Serie A action this season.

His league play was rewarded with a start and rare 90 minutes of action in Thursday’s Europa League encounter with Romanian opposition Astra Giurgiu. The Roman delighted supporters at the Stadio Olimpico with another vintage performance. 

Celtic left-back Kieran Tierney has now figured in two shock results for the Hoops in the UEFA Champions League — their stunning 2-1 win over Barcelona in November of 2012 and their not-as-stunning-but-still impressive 3-3 draw with Manchester City on Wednesday night.

Both matches were at Celtic Park.

But the 19-year-old’s role against City was certainly different than his task against the Blaugrana in 2012.

Theo Walcott can’t help Sven-Goran Eriksson’s strange decision to include him in England’s 2006 FIFA World Cup squad. The cruciate ligament rupture he suffered in 2014, resulting in a 280-day spell on the sideline, was equally unavoidable.

While Walcott’s progress from young phenom to seasoned veteran has been hindered by an assortment of shoulder, abdominal and groin injuries, it’s often forgotten that he’s only 27 years old. 

Noticing the talent of Christian Pulisic and believing he’ll have a great career should no longer be classified as jumping on the hype train. The term 'hype train' is like the plans for a high-speed rail in the United States, a theoretical concept that’s been touted since 1965 but has never materialized. 'Hype train' infers that nothing is settled, that everything is still in the balance.

If Burnley Football Club was a food, it would be a potato.

There's not a lot of flavor here, but there is a lot of starch. The Clarets are a lumpy soccer team. The defenders lump long balls forward and the forwards lump those long balls toward the goals and when the other team is on the attack Burnley's midfielders lump them really hard and if they get past the midfield the defense lumps them even harder.

Liverpool kind-of, sort-of, maybe are starting to look like what Jurgen Klopp wants them to look like.

This should terrify everybody. 

Liverpool played Hull on Saturday, but really "play" is the wrong word, because there was nothing playful about how hard they ran and scrapped and clawed whenever Hull had the ball.

Let's try again: Liverpool worked Hull on Saturday, both in terms of destroying Hull on the scoreboard and working all game, both with and without the ball.

Barcelona traveled to Gijon on Saturday for a difficult match against Sporting. Barcelona made their travels without Lionel Messi, who will be sidelined for three weeks with a groin injury suffered against Atletico Madrid on Wednesday.

In his stead, Neymar and Luis Suarez inspired their side to a resounding 5-0 victory. Neymar registered a brace and Luis Suarez scored Barca's opening goal in the 29th minute.

Newcastle United manager Rafa Benitez’s preference for the tactically astute Vernon Anita at right-back has made league minutes tough to come by for DeAndre Yedlin. However, a three-match suspension for Anita opened the door for the 23-year-old American.

Yedlin was preferred to the Spaniard Jesus Gamez on Saturday for Newcastle’s league encounter with Aston Villa. The American seized his opportunity with a man of the match display but was unfortunately subbed off due to an apparent ankle injury in the 73rd minute.

You want a match summary?

Chichagol. Chichagol. Again, Chichagol.

A remarkable hat-trick from the man, the myth, the legend Javier “Chicharito” Hernandez lifted Bayer Leverkusen to a 3-2 victory over Mainz on Saturday.