Funny

Good God almighty, the unthinkable has happened in Ireland. Limerick FC have pulled off perhaps the greatest transfer coup in the history of soccer, signing electric Brazilian forward Neymar away from heavyweight Barcelona. 

How could this have happened? We haven't been able to pin down any details on the transfer, but it was reported earlier this week that Manchester United might bif 240 million pounds for Neymar, so that's the range we're talking here. 

We're not a website that tends to complain about refereeing decisions, but we think Mohamed Sokhra might have a legitimate grip here. 

Sokhra was kind enough to do the ref's job for him by removing a pitch invader from the field, walking the rogue over to the official, gripping the man's collar. 

After Sokhra had delivered the hooligan to the proper autorities, the referee tossed him out of the game, just as he had tossed the pitch invader out.

We know. It makes no sense to us either. 

Matias Alonso will probably not receive any sympathy from refs in the future after he hurled himself off a stretcher to waste time after "cramping up" in the late stages of Defensor Sporting's 4-3 win over Bolivian side Real Potosi in the Copa Sudamerica. 

The term "fish out of water" doesn't really do justice to what Alonso attempts here, but it's the most accurate description we could think of.

It will be interesting to see if this sparks a trend of players flopping out of stretchers like an unsuspecting person being thrown in a pool.

Jermain Defoe is in need of a personal assistant. And he's willing to pay £60k per year (~$93,500) for the right hire. The Sunderland striker put up an advertisement for the position that was, frankly, hilarious. 

Here are some of his potential personal assistant's duties (with snarky comments from us in parenthesis):