Fails

It Took All This Crazy Shit To Knock The U.S. Out Of The World Cup

Tuesday sure was wild, huh? CONCACAF CONCACAF’d the sh*t out of CONCACAF World Cup qualifiers for two insane hours. There was a lot to take in. A lot. Wacky own goals, rampaging ball boys and hugging commentators. And USMNT World Cup dreams dashed. So like Hillary Clinton after her election loss, let’s revisit what the hell just happened.

Guillermo Ochoa Has Acquired A Vast New Legion Of Haters

Why is Guillermo Ochoa disliked so much? Is it his hairstyle? His success? Does he actually suck? While Guillermo Ochoa is considered a good keeper by most, it’s moments like Tuesday's own goal that get people infuriated and lead to questioning over whether he is the best option for Mexico.

Gabon Insists Bad Orange Juice Cost Them A Spot In The World Cup

As much as Bruce Arena wants you to believe CONCACAF has the toughest World Cup qualifying cycle, North America and the Caribbean have nothing on Africa. Take Gabon, for instance, which is blaming orange juice for its 3-0 loss to Morocco, which ended Gabon World Cup hopes on Saturday.

Neymar Takes To Instagram To Voice Disdain Over ‘Inhuman’ Bolivia Conditions

An already qualified Brazil played to a 0-0 draw with already eliminated Bolivia at the legendary Estadio Hernando Siles in La Paz on Thursday, something of a complete non story. But not when the gregariously self-entitled Neymar is involved! 

Slovakia Hand Initiative To Scotland After Self-Destruction By Way Of Diving

Scotland’s dreams of qualifying for their first major international tournament since the 1998 World Cup were given a major shot in the arm following a dramatic 1-0 victory over Slovakia before a bonkers crowd at Hampden Park in Glasgow.

This Goalkeeper Error Was So Funny Fans Ran Onto The Pitch And Danced

For goalkeepers, one way to tell if you've really screwed up is if fans of the opposing team storm the field, dancing, celebrating what a dunderhead you've turned yourself into. If, in the course of reveling in what a blunder you've made, opposing fans have to be shooed off the field in droves by riot police, you can safely say you've really bit the big one, so to speak.

This goalkeeper in Tanzania knows this feeling all too well.

Watch America’s Guido Rodriguez Kick Rubens Sambueza In The Face

We all know breakups can be tough. One day everything is hunky-dory, next thing you know your sweet heart leaves you and you're faced with running into them in public. 

So what do you do? Greet them naturally? Pretend you don’t see them? Stare at them, tears in your eyes, for 90 minutes? Club America opted to kick their ex-star in the face.

That’s right. Former Club America star Rubens Sambueza was wildly kicked in the face by his compatriot Guido Rodriguez.

An Illegal 84th-Minute Substitution Could Keep FC Dallas Out Of The Playoffs

FC Dallas has been in a free fall in recent months. The club has won just once since a 2-1 win over Montreal on July 22 saw FC Dallas briefly move to the top of the Western Conference, a span of 12 matches that included more than bad losses. It could get even worse after an apparent illegal substitution late in Saturday’s 0-0 draw with Orlando City.

Did Aubameyang Take One Of The Worst Penalty Kicks Of All Time?

Borussia Dortmund had a strong first half on Saturday against Augsburg, taking a 2-1 lead into the break on the back of two gorgeous goals and expecting to stretch out its lead in the second half in the same way that saw them score 19 goals in their first six matches. Instead, Augsburg hung tough and stayed in the match until the match ended 2-1 thanks to some questionable decision making from Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang. 

Flowing One-Two With Corner Flag Leads To Great Goal In England’s League Two

There’s a lot to like about this match-winning goal for Coventry City in their 1-0 victory over Crewe Alexandra on Saturday. Some nice pressure administered high up the pitch from Coventry’s Jodi Jones sees Zoumana Bakayogo’s attempted clearance blocked, and that triggers a fantastic, flowing move for the Sky Blues.

What a one-two with the corner flag. Jones hardly even needs to break stride after that delicious layoff from the inanimate object. The cutback with the outside of his right foot is brilliant as well, and it finds Duckens Nazon!

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