England

The 2016-17 Premier League is the “Year of the Manager.” Some of the world’s most famous, eccentric and respected managers have come to England in search of glory. Pep Guardiola, Jose Mourinho, Antonio Conte, Jurgen Klopp and Arsene Wenger are all elite level managers who have won major trophies throughout Europe. Through tactics, man-management and mind games only one deserving manager will lift the Premier League trophy in May. 

Or maybe none of the aforementioned managers will lift the trophy.  

DeAndre Yedlin isn’t the finished product yet. If DeAndre Yedlin were in the life cycle of a concept, he’d still be in the incubation period — all uncontrollable pace and athleticism, alerting investors to his undoubted physical talents, but still offering no end product and no defensive consistency.

The alarm clock sounds — it’s your favorite tune, “Macarena” by Los del Rio. You get dressed and admire your floppy hair and manicured beard. As you drive to the stadium, the anger in your belly slowly grows stronger. 

You take to the pitch and wait for the whistle, just about ready to unleash your rage. Your opponents become victims to your endless tackles, kicks, grabs and taunts. 

Burnley’s a beautiful little market town in Lancashire, England with a population of around 70,000. The UK Government awarded the town the title “Most Enterprising Area in the UK” back in 2013, so Christian Benteke’s initiative in announcing his move to ‘Burnleyl FC’ via Twitter should come as no surprise. 

Things got a little out of hand during an English League One match between Oxford United and Peterborough United on Saturday. With neither side enjoying the finest of starts in England’s third tier, the awarding of a penalty in the third minute of second-half stoppage had major implications with the scores level at 1-1.

Paul Pogba played his first game back at Old Trafford Friday, so let's talk about Zlatan.

Zlatan is a problem. He has three goals in two games in the Premier League so far, and he looks like the best player in the league so far. Look at this header.

Zlatan Ibrahimovic breaks through for @ManUtd! #PLonNBC https://t.co/VVQFJlY620

"Before winning the 2012-13 league title, we were getting ready to play against Lyon," Marco Verratti said. "Carlo Ancelotti was a bit tense, so Ibra approached him and asked him if he believed in Jesus. Ancelotti said yes, so Ibra told him: 'Good, so you believe in me. You can relax!' Zlatan is like this.”

Verratti’s little story is as good as any when used to describe the kind of figure that Zlatan Ibrahimovic is. 

I'm sorry, I don't actually know if you're having a worse week than Blackburn Rovers defender Shane Duffy. I don't mean to be presumptuous. It's quite possible you're having a worse week than Shane Duffy. If you are, hang in there. Get some sleep. It gets better.

But if you're not having a worse week than Shane Duffy, and it's very likely you're not, feel free to revel in this man's misfortune (soccer misfortune, obviously — real-life misfortune is nothing to revel in).

Sometimes a story comes along that just feels right. This is one of those. Mino Raiola, the super-agent who represents Manchester United new boys Paul Pogba, Zlatan Ibrahimovic and Henrikh Mkhitaryan, has purchased a Miami beach house once owned by crime boss Al Capone.